How to Evaluate a Rink Shower

Last week I didn't feel much like writing and reporting the less than successful weekend the Cats (and I personally) had. White tied again, 4-4, in the exact same manner: a late goal to tie it. In fact, it was with 1.7 seconds left on the clock. See? Nothing to write home about. Red lost 3-2, and I felt I could have been better in both games. I sullenly asked what the point was of all the off-season work I did if I couldn't help my team win. Since finishing Ultimate Goalie Training, I've been dithering around with other workouts, mostly back to the start of "Goalie Workout Club", but I wasn't finding that challenging enough. So on Friday I decided to start UGT over again from the beginning. Let me tell you, Phase 1 was nowhere near the piece of cake I thought it would be. I don't know if it was coincidence or not, but last night I felt back to my old form. Confident, strong, and alert. There were a few saves I made that in previous games probably would have gone in. I'd been over thinking things and playing awkwardly. Now I feel much more confident and comfortable in my own skin. We faced off against a pretty challenging team last night and won 5-1. We played a really good game, including killing off almost 3 complete penalties. (The lone goal came at the very end  of the last PK, on a screened shot from the point). I was very happy with the way I played. Nice change of pace.

Today I'm in the net for Red, at a rink we love to visit because of the proximity to a Houlihan's, which we always end up descending upon after our game. It's pretty funny when the conversation in the locker room goes like this:

"Where are we next week?"

"We're at the Blades"

"Yes!!!! Beers and stuffed mushrooms at Houlihans!!!!"


Personally, I evaluate rinks partially by the likelihood of a decent post-game shower. I'm the only player on either of my teams who showers after a game or practice, and I think for the most part this has a lot to do with the distance of my drive home. Most of them live pretty close to the rink, so don't have the prospect of a long stinky ride home. I got into the habit of it when I used to play early in the morning before work, and it seems to have stuck.  A post game/practice shower is not only refreshing, it's extremely relaxing. Unfortunately, the facilities in a lot of rinks leave a lot to be desired. Perhaps men are a lot less picky about their showers, but I evaluate them based on the following criteria:


Is there actually a handle on the faucet or is it just a knob of hockey tape on the naked stem?
This could be a deal-breaker. The ability to turn the water on is pretty crucial.

Is the water at least lukewarm?
Some showers take a while to warm up, so this could be deceiving. I have showered in some pretty cold showers though, it all depends on how disgusting I am. This also helps train you to take quick showers.

Does it smell like a combination of pee and Axe?
If so, a high school team has been in the locker room the session just before you. A sturdy pair of shower shoes negates the risk.

Are there small insects rising up from the drains?
Yes? Well.... when you run the water you'll drown them, so this one can go either way.

Do the showers join two locker rooms, with access from the other room?
Not a concern for guys, I guess, but when you realize some dude could walk in on you, it's going to be a smelly ride home.

Are there suspicious brown smears on the walls?
I'm not sure how these get there, other than by someone holding their butt cheeks open and spraying like a cat, but if showers are in that condition, I will invariably skip them.

Other than the two professional facilities I've played in, most rink showers seem to fall somewhere in the middle of this spectrum. Sadly, my home rink doesn't pass most of these criteria, but most of the time I end up showering anyway. With my glasses off, I can't see much anyway, so as long as I don't touch anything I'm pretty good. (Except for the brown smears. That is just unacceptable.)