I still can't get over how quickly this season went. The QCats played our final game on Saturday, a win in which I saw 15 shots if I was lucky. Our unofficial record for the season is 12-5-5. That is pretty damn satisfying. We have one practice left, which GoalieHusband and @hkygrl12 have promised will be "fun", but will not reveal any other details. We're all hoping that "fun" means "no Herbies".
We have tournaments lined up for the whole off-season, and I'm definitely looking forward to them, but it's still a little sad for the season to be ending. We're going to feel pretty aimless the next few Sundays, with no games to hurry off to. I guess we can probably fill the void with firepit gatherings and other warm-weather type stuff. (Yuck. Warm weather.)
Fortunately, being the hockey whore I am, I am impacted a little less than the rest of my teammates, since Cougar(hawk)s games go year round. We've got another matinee tonight, and then a game at 11pm tomorrow night. We've also learned that several regular Cougar members are coming back for the Spring session, so our Cougar-Hawk blend is going to have to part ways since there isn't enough room for all of us on the same team. It's too bad, because this team has some pretty good chemistry. But, GoalieHusband and the other Hawks and I are already working on forming a team of our own. It looks like we'll even have a few QCats on the roster. We're tossing around the idea of calling ourselves the Hawks again, and busting out the snazzy yellow jerseys we all bought. More on that in the coming weeks.
On the NHL front, I'm still extremely mopey about Rask being hurt, so I went searching on Youtube for the pre-game interview he did on NESN last week. My perusing also revealed a nifty little video that I watched out of mild curiosity, but which ended up with a huge "A-HA!!!" moment. Bless Tuukka's crazy little Finnish heart, he solved my slimy-glove problem! (Ok, technically I guess his trainer solved it. Tomato, tomahto.)
Showing posts with label Hawks (leauge). Show all posts
Showing posts with label Hawks (leauge). Show all posts
Monday, March 19, 2012
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Closure
I think Senator said it best when, the morning after our final Hawks game, he tweeted: "Closure is nice. It provides an opportunity to fully put a thing behind you instead of simply talking about it." He and "Cap" are the other two players who are making the move to the instructional league. It's something all three of us have been considering for a long time (as you know) and I think is really long overdue. So although it's sad to leave such a fantastic group of guys, I know at least for me this is the right decision. And it couldn't have been more completely confirmed than it was with our last game.
I knew it was going to be pretty bad, but I didn't really expect it to be as bad as it was. We lost 11-3, to a team we know from experience is sorely lacking in class. Individually, there are a few guys on that team who aren't too bad, but as a whole, I can't say enough how glad I am to have put that shit behind me. I personally did not have a very good game, but the whole feel of the experience was like a giant F U. The first period, they played possum and we went up 2-0. Then they "woke up" and put the full press on. By the third period we were down oh, I don't know, something like 8-3, and for the final 5 minutes or so they played as if their lives were on the line, just to rub in in our faces. I'm not really sure how necessary it is to set up 4 guys in front of the net when you're up by a score like that, but hey if that's what gets your rocks off, I'm glad I'm gone. They even made a big show of stopping to have a chat with friends on the glass, mid-game, and shooting the puck up at the ceiling to see if they could hit the lights.
I shouldn't be surprised. This is the team that had a big brawl amongst themselves in the final minute of a game in which we actually beat them. Classless to the end. And for that reason, I declined to go through the handshake line. When the other team is putting on a display like that, and actually laughing at your team on the ice, the completely farcical handshake at the end is insult to injury. I've gone through that line after some really chippy games, but that's hockey. This was just flat out mockery, and I had no desire to pretend to show respect.
I couldn't be happier to have that chapter behind me. I'm very much looking forward to the AIL season, and believe me, I'm not going in there thinking it's going to be a piece of cake. But some even competition would be a welcome change instead of the weekly shellacking I was taking in the "D" league. (Which continues to be a source of wry amusement for me. If that's a "D" league, I'm Patrick fucking Roy.) All I can say about that league is: good riddance. I'm sure there are plenty of guys in AIL who don't belong there either, but when the general level is more matched to your own, the few people who stand out aren't as much of an issue as when the general level is over your head to begin with. I'm sure I'll have nights when I come home grumbling and pissed off, but at least I'll have a chance here. A chance for it to be fun again. Because it hasn't been, not for a very long time.
I knew it was going to be pretty bad, but I didn't really expect it to be as bad as it was. We lost 11-3, to a team we know from experience is sorely lacking in class. Individually, there are a few guys on that team who aren't too bad, but as a whole, I can't say enough how glad I am to have put that shit behind me. I personally did not have a very good game, but the whole feel of the experience was like a giant F U. The first period, they played possum and we went up 2-0. Then they "woke up" and put the full press on. By the third period we were down oh, I don't know, something like 8-3, and for the final 5 minutes or so they played as if their lives were on the line, just to rub in in our faces. I'm not really sure how necessary it is to set up 4 guys in front of the net when you're up by a score like that, but hey if that's what gets your rocks off, I'm glad I'm gone. They even made a big show of stopping to have a chat with friends on the glass, mid-game, and shooting the puck up at the ceiling to see if they could hit the lights.
I shouldn't be surprised. This is the team that had a big brawl amongst themselves in the final minute of a game in which we actually beat them. Classless to the end. And for that reason, I declined to go through the handshake line. When the other team is putting on a display like that, and actually laughing at your team on the ice, the completely farcical handshake at the end is insult to injury. I've gone through that line after some really chippy games, but that's hockey. This was just flat out mockery, and I had no desire to pretend to show respect.
I couldn't be happier to have that chapter behind me. I'm very much looking forward to the AIL season, and believe me, I'm not going in there thinking it's going to be a piece of cake. But some even competition would be a welcome change instead of the weekly shellacking I was taking in the "D" league. (Which continues to be a source of wry amusement for me. If that's a "D" league, I'm Patrick fucking Roy.) All I can say about that league is: good riddance. I'm sure there are plenty of guys in AIL who don't belong there either, but when the general level is more matched to your own, the few people who stand out aren't as much of an issue as when the general level is over your head to begin with. I'm sure I'll have nights when I come home grumbling and pissed off, but at least I'll have a chance here. A chance for it to be fun again. Because it hasn't been, not for a very long time.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Where to start?
I have to apologize (yet again) for pulling a disappearing act. Can I blame the 5 days without heat or power? That was one factor, sure, but that only happened a week and a half ago. I just haven't felt much like writing in here when all there is to say is to rehash the same old thing about the league the Hawks are in. It's also been a bit of a rocky road for yours truly, for the last month or so. It's never fun to admit weakness but I have some mental issues that I deal with and although they're normally well corralled, certain things in "real life" tend to bring them out. And that's when I go into hiding.
But things are looking up now. I've had a few games with the Hawks, all with the same result, so there isn't really much to say on that front, but that will be changing soon. The Cats had their first game back in mid-October, and then were back to practice only until this past weekend. And what a weekend it was. I looked forward for weeks to this weekend, it being a double-header on Sunday. The first game was a Cats matinee (ok, 5pm, but that feels like a matinee to me. Hell that feels like a morning game to me).
I was so ramped up to play that I pestered and pestered GoalieHusband and we arrived at the rink a good 2 hours before game time. It was ok though, because the C team had played earlier, and I knew we'd be able to hang with them until it was time to suit up. We spent a little while outside with the grill, potato chips, and beer (no beer for me though, I was sipping a pre-game coffee), and then it was time to get ready. I brought my stuff into the locker room and discovered, much to my dismay, that there was a bag already in there. In my spot.
I'm not a neurotic goalie. I don't get too kooky over many things, but one thing I am pretty anal about is my spot. I started sitting there because it has the most room, and let's face it, I have the most shit. But now it's just sort of... a given. I even went to the first practice of the season a little early, because I knew we had some new players and I wanted to make sure I had my spot before they got there. I wandered back outside, agitated, and told GoalieHusband and Flipper (who had just arrived) "There's someone in my spot". I think I said it a few times. Honestly, if the person had been there, I would have just asked if they minded moving over, that it's a goalie thing and I'm anal about my spot, but no one was there and it threw me off. #RainMan Flipper went in and took care of it I guess, because after I got back in there, my spot was nice and empty.
It didn't throw my game off though. I had that surging, strong, balls-out feeling that I sometimes get when I'm really in the zone. I felt like I could feel every muscle fiber firing. I was so in the zone that when we gathered at the bench between periods and GoalieHusband gave his pep talk and observations, and then turned to me and said "Goalie. What do you see?" I completely froze. Everyone was looking at me expectantly. And I did have something I wanted to say. But all I saw was eyes. Shit, shit, they're waiting for you to say something. "Umm... I did have something to say but I forgot it", I admitted. Fortunately only a few seconds of laughter passed before I remembered I wanted to warn them about the cherry picker the other team had been placing on the blue line.
The game itself was a very exciting one, for the spectators anyway. And we had quite a few of those. My parents were there, as was a friend of mine with her husband and three kids. For me, though, the only thing that saved me from a batch of healthy self-goalie-hatred was an overtime goal by the one and only "Pants". We went up early, but the other team came back. We managed to hold them at 4-3 until the last minute of the period, when they, naturally, pulled their goalie. With 11 seconds left (ELEVEN FREAKIN SECONDS), they had a shot that I'm 99% sure was going wide, but in my puffed-up over-confidence I went out to play it, and it took a bizarre bounce over my pad and into the net.
I was seriously pissed. I'm not sure how she did it but gionta182 convinced the refs that we were supposed to get an OT period, and although the girls were totally gassed, we pressed and pressed (and I made a few saves), and about 2 minutes into it we scored. Out of respect for the other goalie, I don't cheer when we score. But I cheered for that goal. What a relief. So now we are 1-0-1 (W-L-T) on the young season. And not only that, but we may have gained two converts. Two of my friend's kids, who have been to one other game, now want to play hockey. *JOY*. One is a 10 yr old boy, the other is a 6 yr old girl. All I need to do is get that girl into goal, and the circle of hockey continues. ;)
An hour and a half (and a lot of potato chips and 1 beer) later, I was back on the ice again with the Hawks. With 15 minutes to go before our ice time, we only had a small number of skaters, so we went back outside and dragged hkygrl12 kicking and screaming (ha ha ha) into the locker room with us.
***maalivahti will be with you in a moment, there's a shootout on tv****
She wasn't the only guest; GoalieHusband was on the ice as well. It was great to play with both of them, with my team. I didn't have very high expectations of the game, and in fact I told a teammate "I just played at 5:00. I'm either going to be really good, or really bad".
Well, I guess it was the former. What's that, you say? Didn't you lose 9-3? Why, yes we did. However, the (very unofficial) shot count for the night was 75. That's what a guy from the other team estimated, and two teammates of mine independently came up with that number as well. I certainly don't disagree. I would have given a very conservative estimate of 60, but 75 doesn't sound out of the question. I have never been that exhausted in a game, ever. The only other times I've ever felt like that was after an ass-kicking with my private coach, or after 4 hours in the brutal summer sun back in the "outside on the asphalt" days. But I hung in there. I wish I could see some of those saves now, in retrospect, because I played most of that game in a fog. I do remember several saves that shocked not only me but the other team. I got countless "good save, keep" taps on the pads from them. (This is not to minimize the good words from my own team, but when it comes from the other team, you know they're not just pumping your tires, so to speak). In fact, after the handshake line, one of the other guys skated back around to find me, pointed at me, and said "MVP".
So, 75 shots. "Where was your D?" will be the first question in most people's minds. They were there, busting their asses just as much as I was. And we scored a power play goal, something I don't think we've done in about 3 seasons. All this to illustrate; we are playing at 110% every night and still getting killed, blasted out by 6-9 goals each game. It's time to face the facts. This is not the league for me. Am I a "D league" player? You bet your ass. Are the rest of the guys in this league? Not by a long shot. And after about three years of trying to rectify the situation with the rink, and nothing changing, I'm done. I'm going to the "AIL", where I'll actually have a chance at not getting blown out every single night, and a chance at it being fun again. A few teammates have made the same decision, so at least it won't be a complete dissolution of the team. And I suspect that when the others hear of our move, a few will do the same. By no means can the whole team make that move; it would be beyond unfair for about 5 of those guys to come to the AIL and I don't think they would.
So it's kind of an end of an era for the Hawks. I'm not sure how many of us will be together next season. It's sad, after all these years together, but enough is enough. I'm done with the hit my confidence is taking, with the long, self-loathing rides home from the rink. And knowing some of the guys will be right there with me makes it that much easier. Change can only come when the pain of not changing outweighs the pain of changing.
But things are looking up now. I've had a few games with the Hawks, all with the same result, so there isn't really much to say on that front, but that will be changing soon. The Cats had their first game back in mid-October, and then were back to practice only until this past weekend. And what a weekend it was. I looked forward for weeks to this weekend, it being a double-header on Sunday. The first game was a Cats matinee (ok, 5pm, but that feels like a matinee to me. Hell that feels like a morning game to me).
I was so ramped up to play that I pestered and pestered GoalieHusband and we arrived at the rink a good 2 hours before game time. It was ok though, because the C team had played earlier, and I knew we'd be able to hang with them until it was time to suit up. We spent a little while outside with the grill, potato chips, and beer (no beer for me though, I was sipping a pre-game coffee), and then it was time to get ready. I brought my stuff into the locker room and discovered, much to my dismay, that there was a bag already in there. In my spot.
I'm not a neurotic goalie. I don't get too kooky over many things, but one thing I am pretty anal about is my spot. I started sitting there because it has the most room, and let's face it, I have the most shit. But now it's just sort of... a given. I even went to the first practice of the season a little early, because I knew we had some new players and I wanted to make sure I had my spot before they got there. I wandered back outside, agitated, and told GoalieHusband and Flipper (who had just arrived) "There's someone in my spot". I think I said it a few times. Honestly, if the person had been there, I would have just asked if they minded moving over, that it's a goalie thing and I'm anal about my spot, but no one was there and it threw me off. #RainMan Flipper went in and took care of it I guess, because after I got back in there, my spot was nice and empty.
It didn't throw my game off though. I had that surging, strong, balls-out feeling that I sometimes get when I'm really in the zone. I felt like I could feel every muscle fiber firing. I was so in the zone that when we gathered at the bench between periods and GoalieHusband gave his pep talk and observations, and then turned to me and said "Goalie. What do you see?" I completely froze. Everyone was looking at me expectantly. And I did have something I wanted to say. But all I saw was eyes. Shit, shit, they're waiting for you to say something. "Umm... I did have something to say but I forgot it", I admitted. Fortunately only a few seconds of laughter passed before I remembered I wanted to warn them about the cherry picker the other team had been placing on the blue line.
The game itself was a very exciting one, for the spectators anyway. And we had quite a few of those. My parents were there, as was a friend of mine with her husband and three kids. For me, though, the only thing that saved me from a batch of healthy self-goalie-hatred was an overtime goal by the one and only "Pants". We went up early, but the other team came back. We managed to hold them at 4-3 until the last minute of the period, when they, naturally, pulled their goalie. With 11 seconds left (ELEVEN FREAKIN SECONDS), they had a shot that I'm 99% sure was going wide, but in my puffed-up over-confidence I went out to play it, and it took a bizarre bounce over my pad and into the net.
I was seriously pissed. I'm not sure how she did it but gionta182 convinced the refs that we were supposed to get an OT period, and although the girls were totally gassed, we pressed and pressed (and I made a few saves), and about 2 minutes into it we scored. Out of respect for the other goalie, I don't cheer when we score. But I cheered for that goal. What a relief. So now we are 1-0-1 (W-L-T) on the young season. And not only that, but we may have gained two converts. Two of my friend's kids, who have been to one other game, now want to play hockey. *JOY*. One is a 10 yr old boy, the other is a 6 yr old girl. All I need to do is get that girl into goal, and the circle of hockey continues. ;)
An hour and a half (and a lot of potato chips and 1 beer) later, I was back on the ice again with the Hawks. With 15 minutes to go before our ice time, we only had a small number of skaters, so we went back outside and dragged hkygrl12 kicking and screaming (ha ha ha) into the locker room with us.
***maalivahti will be with you in a moment, there's a shootout on tv****
She wasn't the only guest; GoalieHusband was on the ice as well. It was great to play with both of them, with my team. I didn't have very high expectations of the game, and in fact I told a teammate "I just played at 5:00. I'm either going to be really good, or really bad".
Well, I guess it was the former. What's that, you say? Didn't you lose 9-3? Why, yes we did. However, the (very unofficial) shot count for the night was 75. That's what a guy from the other team estimated, and two teammates of mine independently came up with that number as well. I certainly don't disagree. I would have given a very conservative estimate of 60, but 75 doesn't sound out of the question. I have never been that exhausted in a game, ever. The only other times I've ever felt like that was after an ass-kicking with my private coach, or after 4 hours in the brutal summer sun back in the "outside on the asphalt" days. But I hung in there. I wish I could see some of those saves now, in retrospect, because I played most of that game in a fog. I do remember several saves that shocked not only me but the other team. I got countless "good save, keep" taps on the pads from them. (This is not to minimize the good words from my own team, but when it comes from the other team, you know they're not just pumping your tires, so to speak). In fact, after the handshake line, one of the other guys skated back around to find me, pointed at me, and said "MVP".
So, 75 shots. "Where was your D?" will be the first question in most people's minds. They were there, busting their asses just as much as I was. And we scored a power play goal, something I don't think we've done in about 3 seasons. All this to illustrate; we are playing at 110% every night and still getting killed, blasted out by 6-9 goals each game. It's time to face the facts. This is not the league for me. Am I a "D league" player? You bet your ass. Are the rest of the guys in this league? Not by a long shot. And after about three years of trying to rectify the situation with the rink, and nothing changing, I'm done. I'm going to the "AIL", where I'll actually have a chance at not getting blown out every single night, and a chance at it being fun again. A few teammates have made the same decision, so at least it won't be a complete dissolution of the team. And I suspect that when the others hear of our move, a few will do the same. By no means can the whole team make that move; it would be beyond unfair for about 5 of those guys to come to the AIL and I don't think they would.
So it's kind of an end of an era for the Hawks. I'm not sure how many of us will be together next season. It's sad, after all these years together, but enough is enough. I'm done with the hit my confidence is taking, with the long, self-loathing rides home from the rink. And knowing some of the guys will be right there with me makes it that much easier. Change can only come when the pain of not changing outweighs the pain of changing.
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Of Hybrids, Goalie Pals, and Call-Ups
Hybrid.
What does that word make you think of? A smart little eco-friendly car? Or, as readers of a goalie blog, a goaltending style? Probably the last thing to come to mind, if at all, is a way to describe a female fan's experience of the game. But in so doing, my intrepid goalie gal-pal MsConduct seems to have opened quite a can of worms, if the endless string of comments is any indication. I'm referring, of course, to her execllent inaugural (and extremely well-illustrated) post over at Backhand Shelf. The Bunny Conundrum, indeed. And it's not just those readers who were inspired to come out of their bunny dens and confess... I as well have to finally admit that I am pretty much a "hybrid" myself. I'll let her column do the explaining, because she does a fantastic job of it. I'll wait while you go read it.
Done? Good. My confession is more of a revelation. I've always been one of those people that thought the love of (and intricate understanding of) hockey and appreciation for the outward appearance of a player had to be mutually exclusive. I always felt like if I ever even indicated that I found Player X or Goalie Y attractive, all my "credibility" as a "real fan" would be lost. But reading MsConduct's post made me realize - it doesn't have to be that way. And the more women (and hell, men too) who can stand up and say "I can tell you about a 1-2-2 forecheck or a left wing lock, icing and offsides do not confuse me, and none of that is diminished by the fact that I am not a robot and can freely admit that that guy could single-handedly melt the polar icecaps", the more people will realize that the two viewpoints do not conflict with each other. I still get defensive though. The fact is I'm not watching it for eye candy, I'm watching it for the love and beauty of the game. But all of you certainly know that I know what I'm talking about, so admiting that Kari Lehtonen was my first Finnish goalie crush, and not only in a goalie-skill-appreciation way, isn't going to take anything away. (And if any of you follow both me and MsConduct on Twitter, that cat has been out of the bag for at least a week now anyway. It's so much fun to share the love.)
Back in the very non-glamorous world of beer league, things have been pretty much status quo for the Hawks. We played again two nights ago, and lost again 6-0. I honestly felt like I had a very good game. But I can't reconcile that with the score, and the fact that a few of those goals were just really awful bounces. (Does anyone else hate that term? Saying "it was a bad bounce" reeks to me of excuses. Maybe I'm just a perfectionist.) One was a screen that even Kari wouldn't have seen through. And... one was completely on me. Yes, we blew our coverage on this one guy, but I had every chance to make the save on him. It just so happened that it was one of their better guys, who knows to go glove side high on me for an easy goal. Damn useless glove hand. But I felt I made a ton of very good saves, many through traffic, and many in tight. I even used the VH a few times, and although it seemed the exact right thing to do, and it worked like a charm, I still question myself now every time I use it, because of the bad rap it's been getting in goalie circles from overuse.
We don't play again for over a week, but in the mean time I have two QCat games on my dance card. We've been practicing for a month now, and our first game is on Sunday. I absolutely can't wait to get back out there with the team. I'm really looking forward to the season; I want to pick up right where I left off before I got hurt. But before that game, I'm filling in for the C team on Saturday, for their first game. They have two goalies on their roster, but evidently neither one could make it to this game, so they asked me. Naturally I said yes, but I'm nervous. I'm sure I'll be fine, but of course I'm worried about making an ass out of myself. Don't worry though, as soon as I hit the ice - in both games - all that will be gone from my brain. Nothing to focus on other than how much I love stopping pucks. Come onnnnn, weekend!
What does that word make you think of? A smart little eco-friendly car? Or, as readers of a goalie blog, a goaltending style? Probably the last thing to come to mind, if at all, is a way to describe a female fan's experience of the game. But in so doing, my intrepid goalie gal-pal MsConduct seems to have opened quite a can of worms, if the endless string of comments is any indication. I'm referring, of course, to her execllent inaugural (and extremely well-illustrated) post over at Backhand Shelf. The Bunny Conundrum, indeed. And it's not just those readers who were inspired to come out of their bunny dens and confess... I as well have to finally admit that I am pretty much a "hybrid" myself. I'll let her column do the explaining, because she does a fantastic job of it. I'll wait while you go read it.
Done? Good. My confession is more of a revelation. I've always been one of those people that thought the love of (and intricate understanding of) hockey and appreciation for the outward appearance of a player had to be mutually exclusive. I always felt like if I ever even indicated that I found Player X or Goalie Y attractive, all my "credibility" as a "real fan" would be lost. But reading MsConduct's post made me realize - it doesn't have to be that way. And the more women (and hell, men too) who can stand up and say "I can tell you about a 1-2-2 forecheck or a left wing lock, icing and offsides do not confuse me, and none of that is diminished by the fact that I am not a robot and can freely admit that that guy could single-handedly melt the polar icecaps", the more people will realize that the two viewpoints do not conflict with each other. I still get defensive though. The fact is I'm not watching it for eye candy, I'm watching it for the love and beauty of the game. But all of you certainly know that I know what I'm talking about, so admiting that Kari Lehtonen was my first Finnish goalie crush, and not only in a goalie-skill-appreciation way, isn't going to take anything away. (And if any of you follow both me and MsConduct on Twitter, that cat has been out of the bag for at least a week now anyway. It's so much fun to share the love.)
Back in the very non-glamorous world of beer league, things have been pretty much status quo for the Hawks. We played again two nights ago, and lost again 6-0. I honestly felt like I had a very good game. But I can't reconcile that with the score, and the fact that a few of those goals were just really awful bounces. (Does anyone else hate that term? Saying "it was a bad bounce" reeks to me of excuses. Maybe I'm just a perfectionist.) One was a screen that even Kari wouldn't have seen through. And... one was completely on me. Yes, we blew our coverage on this one guy, but I had every chance to make the save on him. It just so happened that it was one of their better guys, who knows to go glove side high on me for an easy goal. Damn useless glove hand. But I felt I made a ton of very good saves, many through traffic, and many in tight. I even used the VH a few times, and although it seemed the exact right thing to do, and it worked like a charm, I still question myself now every time I use it, because of the bad rap it's been getting in goalie circles from overuse.
We don't play again for over a week, but in the mean time I have two QCat games on my dance card. We've been practicing for a month now, and our first game is on Sunday. I absolutely can't wait to get back out there with the team. I'm really looking forward to the season; I want to pick up right where I left off before I got hurt. But before that game, I'm filling in for the C team on Saturday, for their first game. They have two goalies on their roster, but evidently neither one could make it to this game, so they asked me. Naturally I said yes, but I'm nervous. I'm sure I'll be fine, but of course I'm worried about making an ass out of myself. Don't worry though, as soon as I hit the ice - in both games - all that will be gone from my brain. Nothing to focus on other than how much I love stopping pucks. Come onnnnn, weekend!
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
New Game
Well folks, since there are only so many ways I can say "we played hard but we lost", I'm going to skip the recap of the latest Hawks game. Instead, we'll play a new game. It's called "New Guy In The Locker Room Bullshit Meter".
As is usual lately, we had quite the short bench, so we had to call in reinforcements where we could. There was a guy who subbed in our last game (and scored a nice deflection goal), and two other guys. One of these guys totally rubbed me the wrong way. When I walked in and introduced myself, he told me he knew me from open hockey. I wondered to myself if it was a game I'd played well in, or one I'd stunk to high heaven. Later I realized it was the latter.
He and the other sub were talking a blue streak about a league in another rink and how disorganized it was, and how uneven the competition can be (sound familiar?), and from the sounds of it, they both played there, but not on the same teams. One guy said that Mats Zucarello had been playing in the lowest level league and only recently had been "found out".
WHHOOOOOPPPSSS there goes my bullshit meter.
Folks, we are one step above "instructional" level. There is no way on this polluted stinking planet that The Hobbit was playing in a league equivalent to ours. And, further cementing his gold standard tool status, this guy went on to sing the praises of a dude who played with us for one season, who is mostly remembered for his 20 minute locker room soliloquy about his Way Awesome Car that was so much cooler than all of ours.
And from what I heard, he was none too gracious on the bench, either. I'm sure he had plenty to say about my couple of deer-in-headlights, didn't-even-flinch goals against, and that's fine. That's the first game I've ever played where I wasn't sure if I was going to puke or pass out first, for pretty much the entire game. And that's after a weekend of relaxation. I'm not sure what was going on there, I haven't ever felt like that, not even in a tournament. We have over a week to rest before our next game. One of our regulars who has missed all the games so far will be back. Hopefully we can put together at least a close game, if not a win.
In the mean time- QCats practice tomorrow night. I'm totally psyched for our first game, which isn't until the 16th, but until then: HOCKEY SEASON IS STARTING!!!!!!!!!! GoalieHousehold finally at long last has DVR. Ahhhhh.... no more missing games because of practices or games of my own. No more getting home, rushing to have dinner cooked by 7pm so we can be settled in front of the TV for our Rangers. This also means all the Law & Order SVU episodes I could ever want. Oh, the wonders of technology!
As is usual lately, we had quite the short bench, so we had to call in reinforcements where we could. There was a guy who subbed in our last game (and scored a nice deflection goal), and two other guys. One of these guys totally rubbed me the wrong way. When I walked in and introduced myself, he told me he knew me from open hockey. I wondered to myself if it was a game I'd played well in, or one I'd stunk to high heaven. Later I realized it was the latter.
He and the other sub were talking a blue streak about a league in another rink and how disorganized it was, and how uneven the competition can be (sound familiar?), and from the sounds of it, they both played there, but not on the same teams. One guy said that Mats Zucarello had been playing in the lowest level league and only recently had been "found out".
WHHOOOOOPPPSSS there goes my bullshit meter.
Folks, we are one step above "instructional" level. There is no way on this polluted stinking planet that The Hobbit was playing in a league equivalent to ours. And, further cementing his gold standard tool status, this guy went on to sing the praises of a dude who played with us for one season, who is mostly remembered for his 20 minute locker room soliloquy about his Way Awesome Car that was so much cooler than all of ours.
And from what I heard, he was none too gracious on the bench, either. I'm sure he had plenty to say about my couple of deer-in-headlights, didn't-even-flinch goals against, and that's fine. That's the first game I've ever played where I wasn't sure if I was going to puke or pass out first, for pretty much the entire game. And that's after a weekend of relaxation. I'm not sure what was going on there, I haven't ever felt like that, not even in a tournament. We have over a week to rest before our next game. One of our regulars who has missed all the games so far will be back. Hopefully we can put together at least a close game, if not a win.
In the mean time- QCats practice tomorrow night. I'm totally psyched for our first game, which isn't until the 16th, but until then: HOCKEY SEASON IS STARTING!!!!!!!!!! GoalieHousehold finally at long last has DVR. Ahhhhh.... no more missing games because of practices or games of my own. No more getting home, rushing to have dinner cooked by 7pm so we can be settled in front of the TV for our Rangers. This also means all the Law & Order SVU episodes I could ever want. Oh, the wonders of technology!
Thursday, September 29, 2011
The Quarry Cat Choir
"Jesus this crease is a mess, what the hell was this guy doing down here last period? [scrape scrape scrape]. Ok ready to go, guys are lining up. [tap....tap-tap] Nice, we got the faceoff win. Ah shit nevermind here they come. Over the blue line and..... YEAH haha Grimm got ya buddy. That's my D-man! Now we'll get some zone time. Huh, wonder who those two in the stands are here for. Never seen them before. The dude is taking lots of pictures too. Weird. Wonder if they're New Guy's friends. Wonder where the hell New Guy came from anyway- ah crap
Man on! Man on!
Follow the puck follow the puck Хвилюватися немає причин, як дають, то бери Якщо б’ють, то біжи, кричи. Технологія проста: ким би ти не став Зранку встав, присідай до ста і читай устав... Oh yeah pad up against the post, seal that shit, HA! How come every time I make a save in VH I think man @TheGoalieGuild would hate that
On you, on you, around around!!!
I mean I get his point but it's not ALWAYS bad Хвилюватися немає причин, як дають, то бери Якщо б’ють, то біжи, кричи. Технологія проста: ким би ти не став Зранку встав, присідай до ста і читай устав... ack, penalty. Well GoalieHusband hasn't played in a while, he's gotta get those penalty minutes logged, Mark's encroaching on his title bahaha.
[etc etc, fast forward to the end of the period]
C'mon c'mon guys... yeah Senator, you got it... right... HA! MURPH! WAY TO GO. Wtf? What's with all the yelling? No one in the stands.... OH HEY GIRLS!!! Ha. Nice, they stopped by. Pounding on the glass, cool. Oh shit, that means in a few minutes I'm going to be down there in that net by them. Hope they don't embarrass me too much Хвилюватися немає причин, як дають, то бери Якщо б’ють, то біжи, кричи. Технологія проста: ким би ти не став Зранку встав, присідай до ста і читай устав... Хвилюватися немає причин, як дають, то бери Якщо б’ють, то біжи, кричи. Технологія проста: ким би ти не став Зранку встав, присідай до ста і читай устав...
[horn sounds.... between period huffing and puffing and bench pep talk...]
Alright, heading back to the net. What... why are they opening the door???!??
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!
Ahhh hahaha cute. Ok ok,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOOOOO YOU!!!
OMG. They're not going to sing the whole thing are they??? [take off glove and give them the finger]
HAPPY BIIIIIIIIIIIIRTHDAY DEAR MAALIVAHTIIIII....
Alright I'm just going to crouch here in the crease and pretend I don't exist. Holy crap are you kidding me girls? The other team is staring. Ohhhh some of them are tapping their sticks... haha thanks guys. Ref is laughing too. Nice.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOOOOOOOOOOO YOOOOUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!
Oh dear lord I can't believe this. Ha. Ok now they're done let's get on with the rest of the game here. Ref's getting ready to call us
GOALIE!!! [other goalie waves]
[pause].... BIRTHDAY GIRL!
Ah fuck, seriously man? [wave] Let's go [tap....tap-tap]
...and so it went. Yes, my girls embarrassed the hell out of me. Yes, GoalieHusband skated back towards me at 12:01 to say "happy birthday" (sending up a giant "AWWWWWWW" from the peanut gallery). And throughout the 3rd period, I'd make a save, get an appreciative tap from the opponent and hear "nice save..." [chuckle] "...happy birthday". And yes, we lost, and it was frustrating as hell and I still don't know what I'm doing in this league, because I made some really good saves last night, overall I had a really good game, but inconsistency still haunts me. I make great saves and then give up shitty goals. But given all that, and all the horrendously awful stress at work, I still found myself thinking of the Quarry Cat Choir from time to time during the day, and grinning like an idiot. I am so, so blessed. I have not just one, but TWO awesome teams. Totally different, but awesome each in their own way. Not a bad birthday, not a bad birthday at all. So thanks, @hkygrl12, @lct29, Scarey D, Mayor, and KK, for making me want to disappear but also making me feel loved. Also, can't forget @gionta182 showing up prior to that and screaming her head off for "Coach Sparkle", ragging him and yelling "I KNOW YOU HEAR ME!!!". That's my girl.
Ok, enough of this mushy shit. I have to go do some deadlifts or plyo pushups or something to get that tough-guy, don't-fuck-with-me, I'll-rob-you-blind-sucker feeling back.
(And thanks to this guy for the inspiration for the style of this post.)
Man on! Man on!
Follow the puck follow the puck Хвилюватися немає причин, як дають, то бери Якщо б’ють, то біжи, кричи. Технологія проста: ким би ти не став Зранку встав, присідай до ста і читай устав... Oh yeah pad up against the post, seal that shit, HA! How come every time I make a save in VH I think man @TheGoalieGuild would hate that
On you, on you, around around!!!
I mean I get his point but it's not ALWAYS bad Хвилюватися немає причин, як дають, то бери Якщо б’ють, то біжи, кричи. Технологія проста: ким би ти не став Зранку встав, присідай до ста і читай устав... ack, penalty. Well GoalieHusband hasn't played in a while, he's gotta get those penalty minutes logged, Mark's encroaching on his title bahaha.
[etc etc, fast forward to the end of the period]
C'mon c'mon guys... yeah Senator, you got it... right... HA! MURPH! WAY TO GO. Wtf? What's with all the yelling? No one in the stands.... OH HEY GIRLS!!! Ha. Nice, they stopped by. Pounding on the glass, cool. Oh shit, that means in a few minutes I'm going to be down there in that net by them. Hope they don't embarrass me too much Хвилюватися немає причин, як дають, то бери Якщо б’ють, то біжи, кричи. Технологія проста: ким би ти не став Зранку встав, присідай до ста і читай устав... Хвилюватися немає причин, як дають, то бери Якщо б’ють, то біжи, кричи. Технологія проста: ким би ти не став Зранку встав, присідай до ста і читай устав...
[horn sounds.... between period huffing and puffing and bench pep talk...]
Alright, heading back to the net. What... why are they opening the door???!??
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!
Ahhh hahaha cute. Ok ok,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOOOOO YOU!!!
OMG. They're not going to sing the whole thing are they??? [take off glove and give them the finger]
HAPPY BIIIIIIIIIIIIRTHDAY DEAR MAALIVAHTIIIII....
Alright I'm just going to crouch here in the crease and pretend I don't exist. Holy crap are you kidding me girls? The other team is staring. Ohhhh some of them are tapping their sticks... haha thanks guys. Ref is laughing too. Nice.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOOOOOOOOOOO YOOOOUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!
Oh dear lord I can't believe this. Ha. Ok now they're done let's get on with the rest of the game here. Ref's getting ready to call us
GOALIE!!! [other goalie waves]
[pause].... BIRTHDAY GIRL!
Ah fuck, seriously man? [wave] Let's go [tap....tap-tap]
...and so it went. Yes, my girls embarrassed the hell out of me. Yes, GoalieHusband skated back towards me at 12:01 to say "happy birthday" (sending up a giant "AWWWWWWW" from the peanut gallery). And throughout the 3rd period, I'd make a save, get an appreciative tap from the opponent and hear "nice save..." [chuckle] "...happy birthday". And yes, we lost, and it was frustrating as hell and I still don't know what I'm doing in this league, because I made some really good saves last night, overall I had a really good game, but inconsistency still haunts me. I make great saves and then give up shitty goals. But given all that, and all the horrendously awful stress at work, I still found myself thinking of the Quarry Cat Choir from time to time during the day, and grinning like an idiot. I am so, so blessed. I have not just one, but TWO awesome teams. Totally different, but awesome each in their own way. Not a bad birthday, not a bad birthday at all. So thanks, @hkygrl12, @lct29, Scarey D, Mayor, and KK, for making me want to disappear but also making me feel loved. Also, can't forget @gionta182 showing up prior to that and screaming her head off for "Coach Sparkle", ragging him and yelling "I KNOW YOU HEAR ME!!!". That's my girl.
Ok, enough of this mushy shit. I have to go do some deadlifts or plyo pushups or something to get that tough-guy, don't-fuck-with-me, I'll-rob-you-blind-sucker feeling back.
(And thanks to this guy for the inspiration for the style of this post.)
Monday, September 19, 2011
Way to go, Goalie
On the heels of another blowout loss, I'm actually not moping and navel-gazing. Last night was another 6-0 loss for the Hawks and it certainly wasn't the best game I've ever seen us play (myself included). Two goals in particular stick out as ones I definitely should have had (ok, maybe three). From my vantage point, it seemed like we just couldn't get it together offensively. In the second period, with the score 1-0, one of the guys had a great chance on a wide open net but I guess he was going too fast and the shot was just a few inches shy of the mark. I don't usually do this but I let out a "ugggghhh!". No sooner was it out of my mouth when I thought, "Ooops. Probably shouldn't have done that. Now watch I'll get scored on." Ohhhh look, here comes a breakaway. I stayed with him pretty well but I guess I wasn't square because the puck hit the top edge of my pad and bounced in. CRAP. That should have been an easy one to take right in the flaming C logo.
The other one was another breakaway, with one of our guys coming back and almost even up with him, but the gravitational pull of my enormous 5-hole sucked the puck right off his stick and into the net. That one was just plain awful.
I did make some good saves, but overall I feel I could have played much better. Obviously, without anything on the board for us, none of those bad goals were difference-makers. But I can't rest on my laurels on that fact, because there will come a time when a goal will make a difference, and I can't be letting sloppy shit like that past me. (Naturally, I don't want to let anything past me, but really big errors feel worse than when you give it all you've got).
So either I finally have some perspective, or I'm just tired, but I'm kind of filing last night's game under "it is what it is". We have another game Wednesday night, right after QCat practice. It's a notable one for two reasons; we're making it "throwback night" and wearing our fancy blue jerseys, and we'll be playing the team we had that really nasty game against a few weeks ago. Maybe we should have someone film the game and make it pay-per-view. It'll help defray the cost of the jerseys we got one season's wear out of.
The other one was another breakaway, with one of our guys coming back and almost even up with him, but the gravitational pull of my enormous 5-hole sucked the puck right off his stick and into the net. That one was just plain awful.
I did make some good saves, but overall I feel I could have played much better. Obviously, without anything on the board for us, none of those bad goals were difference-makers. But I can't rest on my laurels on that fact, because there will come a time when a goal will make a difference, and I can't be letting sloppy shit like that past me. (Naturally, I don't want to let anything past me, but really big errors feel worse than when you give it all you've got).
So either I finally have some perspective, or I'm just tired, but I'm kind of filing last night's game under "it is what it is". We have another game Wednesday night, right after QCat practice. It's a notable one for two reasons; we're making it "throwback night" and wearing our fancy blue jerseys, and we'll be playing the team we had that really nasty game against a few weeks ago. Maybe we should have someone film the game and make it pay-per-view. It'll help defray the cost of the jerseys we got one season's wear out of.
Friday, September 16, 2011
Hawks, Cats, and beer - a week in review
First off, let me pat myself on the back for listening to my body. I'm off work today, but instead of going to open hockey this morning, I slept. I know some people will say "I'll sleep when I'm dead" but I've learned that when I ignore my body bad things happen. After a late game Sunday night, another on Monday night, and a hard practice Wednesday night, I was really dragging, so I decided to sleep in. I'm so glad I did. I slept until 11:00, and I feel so refreshed. I guess that's the upside to being forced to take your vacation time.
The week started off with two Hawks games, both of which we lost, but one left me feeling not so bad and the other left me "meh". Sunday night we played with a short bench (again), against a team that brings guys down from their upper level on a regular basis. We lost 6-0, but we all felt like we did damn well against them, considering. At the end of the first it was only 1-0, a personal victory for me since I am prone to giving up early goals, a fact that is frustrating the hell out of me lately. After the second, it was 3-0. Pretty awesome considering our dual handicap. Everyone was really gassed by the third though, and they scored 3 more goals. I'm blaming the last one on our d-man "Grimm". With about 2 minutes to go and the score 5-0, we had a face-off high on the right side after a sustained attack in our zone. Everyone was out of breath, and Grimm said to me as we set up "You're doing great. Let's just keep this at 5, they're all over us right now". I nodded- I'd actually been thinking the same thing. Naturally, they scored right off the face-off. GoalieHusband (who was subbing that night) came back and took the blame for deflecting it, but I placed it solidly on Grimm for jinxing us.
And despite the score, I really did play very well. I was hoping the momentum would follow into the game the next night, but it wasn't to be. I figured I'd be ok, because as I've mentioned here, I seem to play better when I'm exhausted. That wasn't the case on Monday though. I feel I played a pretty average game; a few goals that I definitely should have stopped, but one ridiculous save-gasm of a glove save that stunned even the refs. We'll just ignore the fact that 4 of their goals were scored by one guy, who clearly had no business being on the ice. Even I am sick of hearing myself go on about this issue. We've learned that nothing ever changes at this rink, so I am going to have to just accept that and move on.
After that game I had a much needed day off, and then it was the first practice of the season for the Quarry Cats. I was excited all day, looking forward to it. Yes, we played tons of tournaments this summer, but as most of them were a mixed C/D level, the team was mixed and I only saw a handful of people from our team. It was really great to see the whole team (almost- a few were missing) back on the ice together, and everyone seemed to feel the same. We also have kind of a unique coaching situation this season. When our head coach left, it was pretty unanimous from the team that they wanted GoalieHusband to step into that role. And he would love to be able to. But work combined with him going back to school just won't allow for the time he'd need to commit to the team. As a result we have three other people who are going to fill in the gaps, one of whom is our own @hkygrl12, which I am totally thrilled about. So it'll be an interesting season in that regard, and I'm looking forward to learning from hkygrl12 and the other two guys, who I also know. (One of them plays on one of the other teams in the Hawks' league, which should make for some good trash talking haha).
The practice went very well, but the best part may have been the after-party. Players and coaches from both the D and C teams all hung out in front of the rink, drinking beer and getting caught up. That really gave me a case of warm-fuzzies. We didn't leave until after midnight, and the next day I was a complete zombie after the week I had. But it was completely worth it, and if the after-practice revelry becomes a regular occurrance, I'm totally fine with that. Unfortunately I'll miss it this coming week though, as the Hawks have a game right after QCats practice. It'll be another 2-game, 1-practice week next week. Bring on the OysterGlove.
The week started off with two Hawks games, both of which we lost, but one left me feeling not so bad and the other left me "meh". Sunday night we played with a short bench (again), against a team that brings guys down from their upper level on a regular basis. We lost 6-0, but we all felt like we did damn well against them, considering. At the end of the first it was only 1-0, a personal victory for me since I am prone to giving up early goals, a fact that is frustrating the hell out of me lately. After the second, it was 3-0. Pretty awesome considering our dual handicap. Everyone was really gassed by the third though, and they scored 3 more goals. I'm blaming the last one on our d-man "Grimm". With about 2 minutes to go and the score 5-0, we had a face-off high on the right side after a sustained attack in our zone. Everyone was out of breath, and Grimm said to me as we set up "You're doing great. Let's just keep this at 5, they're all over us right now". I nodded- I'd actually been thinking the same thing. Naturally, they scored right off the face-off. GoalieHusband (who was subbing that night) came back and took the blame for deflecting it, but I placed it solidly on Grimm for jinxing us.
And despite the score, I really did play very well. I was hoping the momentum would follow into the game the next night, but it wasn't to be. I figured I'd be ok, because as I've mentioned here, I seem to play better when I'm exhausted. That wasn't the case on Monday though. I feel I played a pretty average game; a few goals that I definitely should have stopped, but one ridiculous save-gasm of a glove save that stunned even the refs. We'll just ignore the fact that 4 of their goals were scored by one guy, who clearly had no business being on the ice. Even I am sick of hearing myself go on about this issue. We've learned that nothing ever changes at this rink, so I am going to have to just accept that and move on.
After that game I had a much needed day off, and then it was the first practice of the season for the Quarry Cats. I was excited all day, looking forward to it. Yes, we played tons of tournaments this summer, but as most of them were a mixed C/D level, the team was mixed and I only saw a handful of people from our team. It was really great to see the whole team (almost- a few were missing) back on the ice together, and everyone seemed to feel the same. We also have kind of a unique coaching situation this season. When our head coach left, it was pretty unanimous from the team that they wanted GoalieHusband to step into that role. And he would love to be able to. But work combined with him going back to school just won't allow for the time he'd need to commit to the team. As a result we have three other people who are going to fill in the gaps, one of whom is our own @hkygrl12, which I am totally thrilled about. So it'll be an interesting season in that regard, and I'm looking forward to learning from hkygrl12 and the other two guys, who I also know. (One of them plays on one of the other teams in the Hawks' league, which should make for some good trash talking haha).
The practice went very well, but the best part may have been the after-party. Players and coaches from both the D and C teams all hung out in front of the rink, drinking beer and getting caught up. That really gave me a case of warm-fuzzies. We didn't leave until after midnight, and the next day I was a complete zombie after the week I had. But it was completely worth it, and if the after-practice revelry becomes a regular occurrance, I'm totally fine with that. Unfortunately I'll miss it this coming week though, as the Hawks have a game right after QCats practice. It'll be another 2-game, 1-practice week next week. Bring on the OysterGlove.
Saturday, September 3, 2011
I Haven't Showered Yet
Just thought you should know that. Such is my dedication to my blog. (Really, I just wanted to finish my coffee first). Today was the last of the Saturday morning open hockey sessions of the summer. It wasn't my best game ever, that's for sure. I wasn't horrendous- I've certainly played worse- but I just couldn't get into the zone. There were three other goalies, so we were rotating 10 min on and 10 min off, and I'm sure that had something to do with it. Plus, I think I left my balls at home today. I just wasn't being aggressive enough, wasn't challenging. I also desperately need to sharpen my skates. They have no edge whatsoever and my feet went out from under me a few times. Not good.
But, speaking of balls, I've got a great phrase to enter into the hockey lexicon. One of the goalies took a really hard shot to a really bad area. He tried to gut it out but ended up limping off to the bench. When my shift was over I skated by and asked him if he was ok and he replied "Yeah, I'm alright. Just grazed the undercarriage there." This guy's a real pisser, running his mouth (in a non-annoying way) for most of the game. He's also super friendly and supportive of other goalies; it's not unusual for him to yell out "Nice save!" all the way from the other end of the ice. As silly as it sounds, that bolsters my confidence. So hats off to the big guy. He sat on the bench for a bit but decided to call it a day. I hope he went home and sat on a giant block of ice. As the guy on the bench next to me observed "That's a shitty way to end the Saturday season."
Saturday season may be over, but the Hawks season is in full swing. We've had four games so far and our record is... get ready for this... 2-2!!!! And, having won our last two games, we're officially on a winning streak. Both wins were satisfying for reasons other than the W, but the last game was probably the best I've felt about a win (not counting tournament-winning games). We had all of 8 skaters, and were going up against one of the faster teams in the league. We battled and battled and came out with an all-around awesome team win. I think I had a really good game myself, and was even complimented by one of the refs at the end of the game.
That game was on the 25th, and our next game isn't until the 11th. At 11pm. After which we have another 11pm game the next night. Not sure how that kind of scheduling happens but that's the way it goes. That's Sunday and Monday, and then on Wednesday of that week the QCats have their first practice of the season. Which means: hockey season is almost here!! Not much longer now to wait....
Monday, July 25, 2011
Catching up
I'm writing from the beach. I love the ocean but I'm not a typical beach person- I hate the sun and the crowds, but every year my family rents this cottage on the shore and I can sit inside if I have too much sun, and listen to the crashing of the waves and relax. Most years I'm fidgety because I'm missing hockey. One year we even left in the middle of the week to drive back home and play, and come back.
But not this year. This year, I sorely need this break. Maybe I've been making up for lost time since I broke my knee, but I've been going at full tilt. Hawks games, open hockey, five tournaments, rent-outs, subbing here and there, and keeping up with training when I can - I'm exhausted. I haven't written since that ridiculous foggy game, but since then we had another "Goat Rodeo", a Hawks game, I subbed for @gionta182's team, and we just finished a tournament, sort of.
The Hawks game, the final one of the season, was a 6-0 loss, but one after which we all felt really good. Sounds crazy, right? But as with most games, the score doesn't tell the whole ("hole") story. We went up against a team that was undefeated, the team that's moving up to the next division. A whole week ago now, I can't remember exactly how many skaters we had, but it wasn't many. Nine at the most? They had a full bench. And we lost 6-0 but every single person on the team left absolutely every last ounce of energy and will on the ice. I've never seen us so satisfied after a loss that lopsided, and it was well deserved.
Two days later I subbed for gionta182, and her team also was very short on players. And I was short on mojo. Big time. I had probably the worst game I've had in about two years... I can't even explain what happened because I haven't figured it out. I'm going to chalk it up to fatigue. But I let in some ridiculously soft goals, in succession, shot after shot. Fortunately after the first period I got my shit together. But that was just flat out awful. The worst part about it was feeling like I let gionta182 and her whole team down. But I've gotten over that now.
Whatever it was, it only lasted partly through the next game and now is gone. The next game was the first of our most recent tournament, and we faced a team of cheaters. There were two divisions. We were in the lower of the two, and this team would have skated circles around the teams in the higher division. They weren't even really a team, just a group made up of ringers. At the end of the first period it was 6-0 and I had that horrible sinking feeling, that "oh no, it's happening again" feeling. I pulled myself together, and they dialed it way back, and we got out of the game with a score of 9-2.
The next two were much better. The second game was a 7-2 victory, and the third was by far my best performance in a while; a 1-0 shutout. Maybe it was partly emotion that kicked me into high gear in the zone, as we had a scary moment in the first period when one of our players got hurt. She went into the dashers with her chin, head snapping back and back twisting strangely as she fell. An ambulance was called but she insisted on coming off the ice on her own. Play resumed but after a few minutes trying to recoup on the bench, she wasn't doing very well, so when the EMTs arrived, she was taken to the hospital. We learned later she had one broken rib, and given how dizzy she was I wouldn't be surprised if she had a concussion as well. She's kicking my ass in Words With Friends though, so she can't be all that befuddled right now.
When we got off the ice after that 3rd game, knowing that that win guaranteed us a spot in the championship game, against Ringer Team, we unanimously decided to wear our red jerseys. Now, these jerseys were purchased at the beginning of last season, a fun "3rd jersey" to complement our regular ones, but they seem to be cursed. We have never won a game in them. We even wore them in an exhibition game against a team we usually beat, hoping to get the stank off them, but we lost that one too. At first no one listened to gionta182 when she insisted they were cursed, but now no one wants to wear them in a game that means anything. But with a game against the Ringer Team, we figured we had nothing to lose. I know a lot of us were looking forward to it; coming off two very strong games, we were in a position to give them a little more fight than we had in that first game, and I knew I was going to play a lot stronger than I had.
Unfortunately, we never got our opportunity. It's almost comical at this point, really. Recall that we decided the night before to wear our red jerseys in this championship game. The game wasn't until 1:30, so I was lounging in my hotel room when the phone rang at 10:30. It was gionta182, calling me from the rink parking lot. There was a sign on the door saying that due to "unforeseen ice conditions", the rink was closed. Closed?!!? But.... we had a championship game to play! I contacted the QCats' tournament organizer and informed her, and she discovered she had an email saying the rink compressors had died and the game was canceled.
Given that the previous three days had been over 100 degrees, I'm not surprised. This wasn't one of the better rinks we've played in (which is putting it very diplomatically) and I'm sure it wasn't well prepared for keeping two ice surfaces frozen in temperatures like that. Although we knew we didn't stand much of a chance, it was a huge disappointment. I know I'd been looking forward to one last challenge, and leaving without playing the championship game was pretty anti-climactic. However, GoalieHusband and I had delayed our vacation for the tournament, so when all was said and done, we arrived here at the beach earlier than we thought, which gave us some time to spend with relatives we'd otherwise have missed.
So you know what this means. Not only is the Red Jersey Curse real, it apparently extends to mechanical equipment as well. We better get the schneid off them before we travel to Florida again next year. They've been designated as travel jerseys, but at this point, I'd be afraid to get on a plane wearing one.
But there's another tournament and a whole hockey season ahead of us before we have to worry about that. Right now, I think I'll just lay on the beach (under an umbrella, of course) for the week and read. My body is giving me all kinds of signals that I need to slow the f*** down and recuperate for a bit. I've learned I ought to listen to it.
Have a good week or so, folks. I doubt I'll be writing much in that time frame. Our next tournament is the second week in August, and the new Hawks season starts somewhere around that time. Until then... zzzzzzzzzzz....
But not this year. This year, I sorely need this break. Maybe I've been making up for lost time since I broke my knee, but I've been going at full tilt. Hawks games, open hockey, five tournaments, rent-outs, subbing here and there, and keeping up with training when I can - I'm exhausted. I haven't written since that ridiculous foggy game, but since then we had another "Goat Rodeo", a Hawks game, I subbed for @gionta182's team, and we just finished a tournament, sort of.
The Hawks game, the final one of the season, was a 6-0 loss, but one after which we all felt really good. Sounds crazy, right? But as with most games, the score doesn't tell the whole ("hole") story. We went up against a team that was undefeated, the team that's moving up to the next division. A whole week ago now, I can't remember exactly how many skaters we had, but it wasn't many. Nine at the most? They had a full bench. And we lost 6-0 but every single person on the team left absolutely every last ounce of energy and will on the ice. I've never seen us so satisfied after a loss that lopsided, and it was well deserved.
Two days later I subbed for gionta182, and her team also was very short on players. And I was short on mojo. Big time. I had probably the worst game I've had in about two years... I can't even explain what happened because I haven't figured it out. I'm going to chalk it up to fatigue. But I let in some ridiculously soft goals, in succession, shot after shot. Fortunately after the first period I got my shit together. But that was just flat out awful. The worst part about it was feeling like I let gionta182 and her whole team down. But I've gotten over that now.
Whatever it was, it only lasted partly through the next game and now is gone. The next game was the first of our most recent tournament, and we faced a team of cheaters. There were two divisions. We were in the lower of the two, and this team would have skated circles around the teams in the higher division. They weren't even really a team, just a group made up of ringers. At the end of the first period it was 6-0 and I had that horrible sinking feeling, that "oh no, it's happening again" feeling. I pulled myself together, and they dialed it way back, and we got out of the game with a score of 9-2.
The next two were much better. The second game was a 7-2 victory, and the third was by far my best performance in a while; a 1-0 shutout. Maybe it was partly emotion that kicked me into high gear in the zone, as we had a scary moment in the first period when one of our players got hurt. She went into the dashers with her chin, head snapping back and back twisting strangely as she fell. An ambulance was called but she insisted on coming off the ice on her own. Play resumed but after a few minutes trying to recoup on the bench, she wasn't doing very well, so when the EMTs arrived, she was taken to the hospital. We learned later she had one broken rib, and given how dizzy she was I wouldn't be surprised if she had a concussion as well. She's kicking my ass in Words With Friends though, so she can't be all that befuddled right now.
When we got off the ice after that 3rd game, knowing that that win guaranteed us a spot in the championship game, against Ringer Team, we unanimously decided to wear our red jerseys. Now, these jerseys were purchased at the beginning of last season, a fun "3rd jersey" to complement our regular ones, but they seem to be cursed. We have never won a game in them. We even wore them in an exhibition game against a team we usually beat, hoping to get the stank off them, but we lost that one too. At first no one listened to gionta182 when she insisted they were cursed, but now no one wants to wear them in a game that means anything. But with a game against the Ringer Team, we figured we had nothing to lose. I know a lot of us were looking forward to it; coming off two very strong games, we were in a position to give them a little more fight than we had in that first game, and I knew I was going to play a lot stronger than I had.
Unfortunately, we never got our opportunity. It's almost comical at this point, really. Recall that we decided the night before to wear our red jerseys in this championship game. The game wasn't until 1:30, so I was lounging in my hotel room when the phone rang at 10:30. It was gionta182, calling me from the rink parking lot. There was a sign on the door saying that due to "unforeseen ice conditions", the rink was closed. Closed?!!? But.... we had a championship game to play! I contacted the QCats' tournament organizer and informed her, and she discovered she had an email saying the rink compressors had died and the game was canceled.
Given that the previous three days had been over 100 degrees, I'm not surprised. This wasn't one of the better rinks we've played in (which is putting it very diplomatically) and I'm sure it wasn't well prepared for keeping two ice surfaces frozen in temperatures like that. Although we knew we didn't stand much of a chance, it was a huge disappointment. I know I'd been looking forward to one last challenge, and leaving without playing the championship game was pretty anti-climactic. However, GoalieHusband and I had delayed our vacation for the tournament, so when all was said and done, we arrived here at the beach earlier than we thought, which gave us some time to spend with relatives we'd otherwise have missed.
So you know what this means. Not only is the Red Jersey Curse real, it apparently extends to mechanical equipment as well. We better get the schneid off them before we travel to Florida again next year. They've been designated as travel jerseys, but at this point, I'd be afraid to get on a plane wearing one.
But there's another tournament and a whole hockey season ahead of us before we have to worry about that. Right now, I think I'll just lay on the beach (under an umbrella, of course) for the week and read. My body is giving me all kinds of signals that I need to slow the f*** down and recuperate for a bit. I've learned I ought to listen to it.
Have a good week or so, folks. I doubt I'll be writing much in that time frame. Our next tournament is the second week in August, and the new Hawks season starts somewhere around that time. Until then... zzzzzzzzzzz....
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Too good to be true?
I'm almost afraid to come here and write another post about how great I feel and how it seems like the pieces are falling into place, but they are. And other people are noticing. A few nights ago, the Hawks got their 2nd win in the season, which is pretty much over. I think we have 3 games left? Not only that, but it was a 4-2 win. A 4-2 win that was 4-1 until 50 seconds left in the game. The first goal came early in the first period; a penalty shot by their best guy. That last one was a shortie, and everyone got a bit lazy on that one. Myself included; although my D apologized to me, I really felt like I should have had it. It was a breakaway for God's sake, just me and the other guy. The goalie definitely has the advantage there.
But regardless, we won, and I only had two goals against! Pretty awesome right? I can't really take much credit for it though, it was really quite the offensive effort, even on the part of the defense. I honestly didn't even feel like I had that many shots, but after the game when I said "thanks" to one of the refs, he said "you played great, you had a lot of shots". So who knows. What's important is we all played our TAILS off, and got the win. And I felt great and still do.
I also further cemented my about-face in terms of what exactly I'm going to be doing next season. I had an opportunity to fill in for an instructional league scrimmage at the last minute, and it was pretty interesting. I got the email from Gionta182 yesterday afternoon; there was going to be a scrimmage (with refs) and a goalie was needed. Naturally I accepted. I'm not too clear on the situation but one chick told me while we were getting changed that the other team was supposed to play a regularly scheduled game, but their opponent couldn't come because there was a death and lots of players weren't going to make it. I hope to God it wasn't the death of an actual player. Not sure what that's all about. But I got the impression that they put the call out to get some skaters and a goalie to scrimmage against so as not to lose the ice time.
I thought there were going to be two goalies, but when we all hit the ice, there was the blue team, and the hodge-podge white team (which Gionta182 was a part of), and neither had a goalie. Since the white team was Gionta182's, I started on that side, but I'd told the other guys I'd split my time. Well, Gionta182 wasn't too happy about that. She protested, saying if I really was an asshole, I'd just stay on her side. I tried to bait her, asking if she didn't want to try to score on me.... BITCH??!? Hahaha. Her teammate appreciated that. That's when she said "No... I actually want to have a chance to score. You're like Marty in there." Now who's baiting who? I think Maaaaarttyyyyy probably dropped dead wherever he was. What, me? A butterfly goalie? Compared to him? THE HORROR!!!! Ahhh rivalries.
But I got off track. What was interesting about the experience was that I felt like a fish out of water. While the white team had it together, the blue team was giving me fits. I had no idea what to expect from their shots, and consequently was beaten on two I would have normally stopped. I think I had too much time to think. And now, after thinking for a bit, I definitely don't think we belong in Instructional. It seems like that's the general consensus of the others who were thinking about leaving as well, so I don't think I have much crow to eat. Really, when all is said and done, I just want to stay with my team. I think a big part of the problem was my confidence, and I am starting to get that back now. Hopefully I haven't just completely damned myself writing a post like this. I'm on a mission now. I think open hockey holds the key. The more I get myself out there, the better I feel, the better I play. I guess I'll just have to sleep when I'm dead.
But regardless, we won, and I only had two goals against! Pretty awesome right? I can't really take much credit for it though, it was really quite the offensive effort, even on the part of the defense. I honestly didn't even feel like I had that many shots, but after the game when I said "thanks" to one of the refs, he said "you played great, you had a lot of shots". So who knows. What's important is we all played our TAILS off, and got the win. And I felt great and still do.
I also further cemented my about-face in terms of what exactly I'm going to be doing next season. I had an opportunity to fill in for an instructional league scrimmage at the last minute, and it was pretty interesting. I got the email from Gionta182 yesterday afternoon; there was going to be a scrimmage (with refs) and a goalie was needed. Naturally I accepted. I'm not too clear on the situation but one chick told me while we were getting changed that the other team was supposed to play a regularly scheduled game, but their opponent couldn't come because there was a death and lots of players weren't going to make it. I hope to God it wasn't the death of an actual player. Not sure what that's all about. But I got the impression that they put the call out to get some skaters and a goalie to scrimmage against so as not to lose the ice time.
I thought there were going to be two goalies, but when we all hit the ice, there was the blue team, and the hodge-podge white team (which Gionta182 was a part of), and neither had a goalie. Since the white team was Gionta182's, I started on that side, but I'd told the other guys I'd split my time. Well, Gionta182 wasn't too happy about that. She protested, saying if I really was an asshole, I'd just stay on her side. I tried to bait her, asking if she didn't want to try to score on me.... BITCH??!? Hahaha. Her teammate appreciated that. That's when she said "No... I actually want to have a chance to score. You're like Marty in there." Now who's baiting who? I think Maaaaarttyyyyy probably dropped dead wherever he was. What, me? A butterfly goalie? Compared to him? THE HORROR!!!! Ahhh rivalries.
But I got off track. What was interesting about the experience was that I felt like a fish out of water. While the white team had it together, the blue team was giving me fits. I had no idea what to expect from their shots, and consequently was beaten on two I would have normally stopped. I think I had too much time to think. And now, after thinking for a bit, I definitely don't think we belong in Instructional. It seems like that's the general consensus of the others who were thinking about leaving as well, so I don't think I have much crow to eat. Really, when all is said and done, I just want to stay with my team. I think a big part of the problem was my confidence, and I am starting to get that back now. Hopefully I haven't just completely damned myself writing a post like this. I'm on a mission now. I think open hockey holds the key. The more I get myself out there, the better I feel, the better I play. I guess I'll just have to sleep when I'm dead.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
What Took Ya So Long?
Two posts ago I mentioned that I felt a subtle shift in my game, and that I hoped GoalieBrain wasn't far behind. I think someone finally woke the bitch up, because we had a game Sunday night, and I was in the zone. Really in the zone. So much so that two direct shots to the middle of the forehead, and being completely flattened two times couldn't knock me out of it. Did we win? No. Another loss, but hallelujah, this one was "only" 5-3. That might be my lowest goals against in about 2 seasons in this league. And yet again, we mounted a comeback; at one point we were down 5-0.
Originally, I was unsure I'd even play this game. GH and I were off on a camping trip for the three days before the game, and I wasn't sure I'd be in the best shape after that. But then I came to my senses. Of course I was going to play, hello what was I thinking? And I'm glad I did. That game was another brick in the re-forming wall of my confidence. I'm feeling better about everything; my game, the team, even the league situation. Getting my mojo back (even if it's only partly back, that's better than nothing!) sort of cleared my head a little, and now I'm not so sure moving to the Instructional League is the answer. Add to that the fact that the rink is actually - finally - taking some steps to clean that league up and make it more how it is supposed to be, and I'm almost 180* from where I was a few weeks ago. We may not completely fit in our league the way it is now, but I really don't think we belong in the Instructional League either, especially if they're trying to get that whole thing sorted out.
So, lots to chew on. And Saturday morning open hockey is starting up this week, which I'm really looking forward to. I haven't been able to go on Friday mornings like I used to, and I really miss it. I think doing drop-ins regularly will help keep me on the upward climb. I sure hope so, because I was pretty miserable for a while there. It feels good to be looking forward to ice times again.
Originally, I was unsure I'd even play this game. GH and I were off on a camping trip for the three days before the game, and I wasn't sure I'd be in the best shape after that. But then I came to my senses. Of course I was going to play, hello what was I thinking? And I'm glad I did. That game was another brick in the re-forming wall of my confidence. I'm feeling better about everything; my game, the team, even the league situation. Getting my mojo back (even if it's only partly back, that's better than nothing!) sort of cleared my head a little, and now I'm not so sure moving to the Instructional League is the answer. Add to that the fact that the rink is actually - finally - taking some steps to clean that league up and make it more how it is supposed to be, and I'm almost 180* from where I was a few weeks ago. We may not completely fit in our league the way it is now, but I really don't think we belong in the Instructional League either, especially if they're trying to get that whole thing sorted out.
So, lots to chew on. And Saturday morning open hockey is starting up this week, which I'm really looking forward to. I haven't been able to go on Friday mornings like I used to, and I really miss it. I think doing drop-ins regularly will help keep me on the upward climb. I sure hope so, because I was pretty miserable for a while there. It feels good to be looking forward to ice times again.
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Practice, Competition, Body Language, and Muscle Memory
It's almost tourney time again, folks! And since we're hosting this one, I'm extra excited. Hopefully it won't rain on our BBQ on Saturday. That would suck. We had two extra ice slots that we didn't use during the season, so we're using them for practices to get ready. We had one last week, and have one again tonight. Last week's practice went well; I was suitably wiped afterwards. Gionta182 had a couple of nice goals on me, but I got some good saves on her too. I have to be more patient on breakaways. I also had trouble with another player, who kept putting it past me glove side. *Mental note: don't keep going down so early dammit.
We scrimmaged for a bit at the end of practice, and after about 10 minutes I could see the girls were getting really gassed, so I suggested a shootout. (That's when Gionta182 got one of her nice ones. Dammit.) We ran through several shooters, and then the zamboni doors opened and people started heading off the ice. I was following suit when I heard someone yell "GOALIE!" I looked up and there at the red line with the pucks was "Slick". I cracked a big grin.
Slick and I have a fun little competition going. I'm not even sure she realizes it, but being the competitor she is, I think she probably does. She plays for the C team, and is very, very good. She's the kind of forward I actually watch and admire, the way she makes it look so effortless. Quite some time ago, Hkygrl12's men's team scrimmaged against the C team and invited me to play. It was during that game that I stopped her several times (much to my surprise actually), and kept her off the scoreboard. We've run into each other once or twice since then and it's always fun to see if I can match up to her level. For some reason, I usually do. It's my own little private feather in my cap. (Not so private anymore- HI INTERNET!!!) All of that as lead-up to explain why I kicked into "bring it!" gear when looked up and saw that it was her at the red line, challenging me. She tried some fancy Marty St. Louis move on me, and I stopped her, just barely. The puck bounced and went under my pad and for a minute I thought it went in, but it didn't. Sweet.
I got another chance last night when the Hawks faced the MedWings, who she's played for a few times. Unfortunately she scored on me once (a sweet little back door tap-in from the top of the crease off a quick pass from just above the goal line... grrrr), but I did get a really nice save on her in the 3rd period. It was a high point to an otherwise somewhat frustrating game. We lost 7-6, but in the "silver lining" department, we battled back from a 7-2 deficit to get there.
I have one issue that's kind of been brewing and I had intended to handle it myself, but it didn't work out that way. I have one D-man, and now his partner is picking up the habit, who slams his stick after every goal. Used to be just once in a while. Now it's every goal he's on the ice for. I know in my rational head that he's probably mostly pissed about a mistake he made or thinks he made, but that is really poor sportsmanship and sends the wrong message to me, the team, and the other team quite frankly. It's the reason I never, ever, bang my stick, no matter how frustrated I am with myself about a goal. (I'll swear a blue streak, but I never bang my stick). So, I planned to mention something to him about it, off the ice, just in passing, not making a big deal about it. But last night after four goals in the first period, and three in the second, I was really starting to heat up. He was on the ice for a good amount of them and slammed his stick every single time. On the final goal, he wasn't out there, but GoalieHusband was, and was right next to me, and I was so worked up he got an earful about it. I think it went something like "why does my fucking D have to fucking bang their fucking stick every fucking goddamn time". Not exactly how I had planned to address it. ;) Evidently he went to the bench and mentioned it to the guy, who said it wasn't personal at all, but hopefully the message got across. I appreciate that he did that for me, but I hope it doesn't look bad that he was "messenger boy".
But that aside... I'm feeling pretty good today, yes even after 7 goals. I felt something click. I don't know why it's taken this long, but I am finally getting my muscle memory back. I was only out for 2 months- some people miss that much time just because of stuff that needs to be done at home or with/for the kids, etc, and come back with no more than just a little rust. But in the third period, I felt a subtle shift in my muscles and my movement. I know this sounds silly, but I felt it. Hopefully GoalieBrain isn't far behind, because she's been in a coma lately. Gotta poke that bitch with a stick and wake her ass up. I have a tournament to play in, let's go, cupcake.
We scrimmaged for a bit at the end of practice, and after about 10 minutes I could see the girls were getting really gassed, so I suggested a shootout. (That's when Gionta182 got one of her nice ones. Dammit.) We ran through several shooters, and then the zamboni doors opened and people started heading off the ice. I was following suit when I heard someone yell "GOALIE!" I looked up and there at the red line with the pucks was "Slick". I cracked a big grin.
Slick and I have a fun little competition going. I'm not even sure she realizes it, but being the competitor she is, I think she probably does. She plays for the C team, and is very, very good. She's the kind of forward I actually watch and admire, the way she makes it look so effortless. Quite some time ago, Hkygrl12's men's team scrimmaged against the C team and invited me to play. It was during that game that I stopped her several times (much to my surprise actually), and kept her off the scoreboard. We've run into each other once or twice since then and it's always fun to see if I can match up to her level. For some reason, I usually do. It's my own little private feather in my cap. (Not so private anymore- HI INTERNET!!!) All of that as lead-up to explain why I kicked into "bring it!" gear when looked up and saw that it was her at the red line, challenging me. She tried some fancy Marty St. Louis move on me, and I stopped her, just barely. The puck bounced and went under my pad and for a minute I thought it went in, but it didn't. Sweet.
I got another chance last night when the Hawks faced the MedWings, who she's played for a few times. Unfortunately she scored on me once (a sweet little back door tap-in from the top of the crease off a quick pass from just above the goal line... grrrr), but I did get a really nice save on her in the 3rd period. It was a high point to an otherwise somewhat frustrating game. We lost 7-6, but in the "silver lining" department, we battled back from a 7-2 deficit to get there.
I have one issue that's kind of been brewing and I had intended to handle it myself, but it didn't work out that way. I have one D-man, and now his partner is picking up the habit, who slams his stick after every goal. Used to be just once in a while. Now it's every goal he's on the ice for. I know in my rational head that he's probably mostly pissed about a mistake he made or thinks he made, but that is really poor sportsmanship and sends the wrong message to me, the team, and the other team quite frankly. It's the reason I never, ever, bang my stick, no matter how frustrated I am with myself about a goal. (I'll swear a blue streak, but I never bang my stick). So, I planned to mention something to him about it, off the ice, just in passing, not making a big deal about it. But last night after four goals in the first period, and three in the second, I was really starting to heat up. He was on the ice for a good amount of them and slammed his stick every single time. On the final goal, he wasn't out there, but GoalieHusband was, and was right next to me, and I was so worked up he got an earful about it. I think it went something like "why does my fucking D have to fucking bang their fucking stick every fucking goddamn time". Not exactly how I had planned to address it. ;) Evidently he went to the bench and mentioned it to the guy, who said it wasn't personal at all, but hopefully the message got across. I appreciate that he did that for me, but I hope it doesn't look bad that he was "messenger boy".
But that aside... I'm feeling pretty good today, yes even after 7 goals. I felt something click. I don't know why it's taken this long, but I am finally getting my muscle memory back. I was only out for 2 months- some people miss that much time just because of stuff that needs to be done at home or with/for the kids, etc, and come back with no more than just a little rust. But in the third period, I felt a subtle shift in my muscles and my movement. I know this sounds silly, but I felt it. Hopefully GoalieBrain isn't far behind, because she's been in a coma lately. Gotta poke that bitch with a stick and wake her ass up. I have a tournament to play in, let's go, cupcake.
Monday, May 23, 2011
With decision, comes relief
It's so strange. You'd think I'd know myself by now. You'd think I'd realize that when I fight and fight and fight against something, it's usually that thing that I need most to do/accept. Maybe my skull is as thick as my goalie mask and then some, but after a 12-5 shellacking, it finally sunk in: I do not belong in the league I'm playing in. Neither, quite frankly, does most of my team. So no, this is not going to be a "waaah I suck" post. Trust me, I've given this lots of thought.
A few weeks ago, on the way home from yet another double-digit loss, GoalieHusband hit the nail squarely on the head. We are playing against guys who have a hockey background, who played in high school and possibly in college, who certainly have a lot more experience and coaching than a bunch of passionate idiots who just took the sport up in their 30's, outside on the asphalt. (And I use "idiots" as a term of endearment here.) Because we are nothing if not passionate. And it is that passion, that I think has kept me from admitting to myself what the hockey gods have so desperately been trying to show me. We (GoalieHusband and I- I'm not speaking for the whole team here) need to move down a level.
I've fought against this so vehemently in my mind because the next level down is the Adult Instructional League (AIL), which is where we started when we first switched to ice. Talk about coming back with your tail between your legs. But in the years since we've been in that league, things have changed. It is an instructional league in name only. The league levels at this rink are ridiculously skewed. There are players from the QCats C team playing in the AIL. There are players with probably a lot more hockey experience than me playing in the AIL. Why? Because they have or know they would get smoked in the "Lower D" league. Yeah. The next level up isn't even called D. It's called Lower D. So, if the AIL is truly D, then the Lower D is really more like a C, which means the D level is probably a high C/almost B.
I hope I haven't lost too many people with that alphabet soup. It was my pride that made me balk at going "back down" to the AIL. When in fact, the more I think about it, the more I realize that's where I belong - in its current incarnation. When I started this whole journey out, I just assumed that I'd start out a raw beginner and keep progressing and moving up. And I thought that's how everyone looked at it. Now that I'm in the thick of it, I realize it's not like that across the board. I realize that as competitive as I am, as passionately as I pursue this hobby, it has to also be about fun. And I'm not having fun anymore.
Like I said, I know I don't belong at this level, but I'm not shouldering the entire burden and beating myself up over it. I'm trying to be objective. Last night was just a microcosm. I started out playing great. Play was in our zone most of the time and yet we got out of the first period only down 2-0, and got a goal early in the 2nd. I continued playing well, but then everything fell apart. All of us. They scored 7 goals in the 2nd period, and it just got worse from there. I'd prefer to not rehash all of it. I do know that making matters worse was one guy playing down from the level above (he was even wearing his jersey from that team), a show-off guy who even when the score was 9-3 would take it end to end, flip it past me effortlessly, and gloat. Several times.
This is not fun. Losing every night, racking up 8, 9 now even 10 or 12 goals against, regardless of whose "fault" they are (as teammates try to assure me they are not all my "fault"), is not fun. Driving home week after week after games like that sucks. The next day sucks. I'm sick of it. I want it to be fun again, and I think it will be if I get back to where I belong. As I told a friend today, I don't give a shit what the league is called, I just want to have a chance at having a good time. I'm certainly not saying it's 100% about fun and winning doesn't matter- because it does. But losing that badly all the time just sucks.
Of course there's the little monster in the back of my head that whispers to me "You know, they beat that team 5-2 when your sub was in net...." I don't know what happened, but when I was out, the pieces fell together. The team was playing well. Maybe part of the pieces that fell together was having someone else in net. I really don't think he's all that much better than me but the facts speak for themselves. We have the same team now as we did when I was out and they did so well. The only thing different is me being back. I'm sick of feeling like I'm letting my team down.
So where does that leave things? I can't say for 100% certain but I don't think I'll be in this league after this season. And from some comments from some other guys after the game, I don't think GH and I will be the only ones. It sucks. I've loved this team. It's a great bunch. But I can't keep putting myself through this wringer. Whether it truly is just me, or whether it's everyone (with the exception of our 3 top guys), it doesn't matter. All I know is, I woke up today feeling a little bit lighter, and not cranky or brooding over the game, because I realized that I needed to make a change. And change sucks. I hate it. I can't even tell you how much I hate it. I'm going to miss these guys something fierce. But I think I have to do this.
Hockey isn't supposed to hurt this much, dammit.
A few weeks ago, on the way home from yet another double-digit loss, GoalieHusband hit the nail squarely on the head. We are playing against guys who have a hockey background, who played in high school and possibly in college, who certainly have a lot more experience and coaching than a bunch of passionate idiots who just took the sport up in their 30's, outside on the asphalt. (And I use "idiots" as a term of endearment here.) Because we are nothing if not passionate. And it is that passion, that I think has kept me from admitting to myself what the hockey gods have so desperately been trying to show me. We (GoalieHusband and I- I'm not speaking for the whole team here) need to move down a level.
I've fought against this so vehemently in my mind because the next level down is the Adult Instructional League (AIL), which is where we started when we first switched to ice. Talk about coming back with your tail between your legs. But in the years since we've been in that league, things have changed. It is an instructional league in name only. The league levels at this rink are ridiculously skewed. There are players from the QCats C team playing in the AIL. There are players with probably a lot more hockey experience than me playing in the AIL. Why? Because they have or know they would get smoked in the "Lower D" league. Yeah. The next level up isn't even called D. It's called Lower D. So, if the AIL is truly D, then the Lower D is really more like a C, which means the D level is probably a high C/almost B.
I hope I haven't lost too many people with that alphabet soup. It was my pride that made me balk at going "back down" to the AIL. When in fact, the more I think about it, the more I realize that's where I belong - in its current incarnation. When I started this whole journey out, I just assumed that I'd start out a raw beginner and keep progressing and moving up. And I thought that's how everyone looked at it. Now that I'm in the thick of it, I realize it's not like that across the board. I realize that as competitive as I am, as passionately as I pursue this hobby, it has to also be about fun. And I'm not having fun anymore.
Like I said, I know I don't belong at this level, but I'm not shouldering the entire burden and beating myself up over it. I'm trying to be objective. Last night was just a microcosm. I started out playing great. Play was in our zone most of the time and yet we got out of the first period only down 2-0, and got a goal early in the 2nd. I continued playing well, but then everything fell apart. All of us. They scored 7 goals in the 2nd period, and it just got worse from there. I'd prefer to not rehash all of it. I do know that making matters worse was one guy playing down from the level above (he was even wearing his jersey from that team), a show-off guy who even when the score was 9-3 would take it end to end, flip it past me effortlessly, and gloat. Several times.
This is not fun. Losing every night, racking up 8, 9 now even 10 or 12 goals against, regardless of whose "fault" they are (as teammates try to assure me they are not all my "fault"), is not fun. Driving home week after week after games like that sucks. The next day sucks. I'm sick of it. I want it to be fun again, and I think it will be if I get back to where I belong. As I told a friend today, I don't give a shit what the league is called, I just want to have a chance at having a good time. I'm certainly not saying it's 100% about fun and winning doesn't matter- because it does. But losing that badly all the time just sucks.
Of course there's the little monster in the back of my head that whispers to me "You know, they beat that team 5-2 when your sub was in net...." I don't know what happened, but when I was out, the pieces fell together. The team was playing well. Maybe part of the pieces that fell together was having someone else in net. I really don't think he's all that much better than me but the facts speak for themselves. We have the same team now as we did when I was out and they did so well. The only thing different is me being back. I'm sick of feeling like I'm letting my team down.
So where does that leave things? I can't say for 100% certain but I don't think I'll be in this league after this season. And from some comments from some other guys after the game, I don't think GH and I will be the only ones. It sucks. I've loved this team. It's a great bunch. But I can't keep putting myself through this wringer. Whether it truly is just me, or whether it's everyone (with the exception of our 3 top guys), it doesn't matter. All I know is, I woke up today feeling a little bit lighter, and not cranky or brooding over the game, because I realized that I needed to make a change. And change sucks. I hate it. I can't even tell you how much I hate it. I'm going to miss these guys something fierce. But I think I have to do this.
Hockey isn't supposed to hurt this much, dammit.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Blame Twitter
I'm noticing a trend. Twitter is making me a terrible blogger. I vent my spleen in short bursts there, and then never come here and write out the whole story. Since my last post, I've played a Hawks game (first back on the ice with them!), a game of open hockey, and attempted to play another... but haven't written squat about any of it. That trend has to change, especially with the tournament coming up. We're bringing the netbook, and I definitely have to write at least a few times while we're gone, because there's no way I'm going to be able to cram 5 days of hockey and vacation into one post when I get back. Well hey, there's always the @Geffman47 twitlonger approach. Haha.
The Hawks game was a re-match against the team that beat us for the championship. We won 9-6. I'm happy about the win, but not happy about the goal total. A couple were impossible screens, one shouldn't have counted at all but the ref just wanted to go home, and the rest... well I should have had those. At no time were we trailing, though. We went up 2-0 in the first, but they came back, and then we just traded goals from there. It felt great to get that win, but like I said I wasn't thrilled with my play.
GoalieHusband had a rare weekday off of work, so I took 2 hours of personal time myself and we hit open hockey Wednesday morning. I am so spoiled by morning open hockey at that rink. General lack of douchebags, great skill level and pace, and I just seem to really do well there. This time I really killed it. There was one hot-shot who had to do everything himself, but he was easy to handle, since with a guy like that you never have to worry about the pass. There was another guy who was really good, and got a few breakaways on me on my first shift, but I stoned him every time. Man that felt good.
We intended to play some more open hockey this weekend, but the rink that has stood us up like a lousy girlfriend several times screwed us over again. Shame on us for going back after a few years expecting anything different. Here's a hint, South Mountain Arena: if you have ADULT OPEN HOCKEY listed on your website, don't allow 10-12 yr olds to sign in, and don't tell parents it's ok if they just skate around on the ice with them. At least they were good enough to give us our money back. But no way in hell will we ever be going there again for "open hockey".
At this point though, I have knots in my stomach already for the upcoming trip to Tampa. But before I get to that hurdle, we have a Hawks game. Tuesday night. Against the Drunk Punks. I can't wait. Hell, my gear's already packed, since I never used it last night. Perfect way to start a hockey vacation; with a hockey game.
Quick reader poll: should I bring my Khabibulin Lightning jersey on the trip? I was going to bring my Ranger jersey, to show my colors, but since they're out of it now... I'm thinking maybe I'll show some local support while I'm down there.
The Hawks game was a re-match against the team that beat us for the championship. We won 9-6. I'm happy about the win, but not happy about the goal total. A couple were impossible screens, one shouldn't have counted at all but the ref just wanted to go home, and the rest... well I should have had those. At no time were we trailing, though. We went up 2-0 in the first, but they came back, and then we just traded goals from there. It felt great to get that win, but like I said I wasn't thrilled with my play.
GoalieHusband had a rare weekday off of work, so I took 2 hours of personal time myself and we hit open hockey Wednesday morning. I am so spoiled by morning open hockey at that rink. General lack of douchebags, great skill level and pace, and I just seem to really do well there. This time I really killed it. There was one hot-shot who had to do everything himself, but he was easy to handle, since with a guy like that you never have to worry about the pass. There was another guy who was really good, and got a few breakaways on me on my first shift, but I stoned him every time. Man that felt good.
We intended to play some more open hockey this weekend, but the rink that has stood us up like a lousy girlfriend several times screwed us over again. Shame on us for going back after a few years expecting anything different. Here's a hint, South Mountain Arena: if you have ADULT OPEN HOCKEY listed on your website, don't allow 10-12 yr olds to sign in, and don't tell parents it's ok if they just skate around on the ice with them. At least they were good enough to give us our money back. But no way in hell will we ever be going there again for "open hockey".
At this point though, I have knots in my stomach already for the upcoming trip to Tampa. But before I get to that hurdle, we have a Hawks game. Tuesday night. Against the Drunk Punks. I can't wait. Hell, my gear's already packed, since I never used it last night. Perfect way to start a hockey vacation; with a hockey game.
Quick reader poll: should I bring my Khabibulin Lightning jersey on the trip? I was going to bring my Ranger jersey, to show my colors, but since they're out of it now... I'm thinking maybe I'll show some local support while I'm down there.
Friday, April 1, 2011
Bitter disappointment
Most people outside of sports would probably say the passion I have for playing, and the dedication I have to my teams borders on unhealthy. Hockey has become my life. So on Wednesday morning, when I played open hockey and felt like my old self again, I was elated. That meant I could catch the next game with the Hawks! There was a game that night, but of course I wasn't going to push myself in at the last minute and tell my sub to take a hike. If they won, and there were going to be subsequent games, I had no reason to believe I wouldn't be playing them. After all, I had been told I could come back whenever I was ready. When I found out there was going to be a game this Sunday, I got really excited. I'd be playing with my team again!!! And then I came crashing down.
Evidently, it had been decided by the team after Wednesday's game that even though I was ready to come back, the sub would still play the one or two playoff games remaining. It was decided that it wouldn't be "fair" to him when he came in, played two-thirds of the season's games, some with obnoxiously late times, without complaint and with a good attitude, to say 'hey thanks but our goalie is back, see ya'. While I can kind of see that side of it, I feel like I've been kicked in the teeth. It makes me wonder what about what's "fair" to the goalie you've had for four years? Also complicating matters is the fact that I'm ready sooner than I thought I would be. In previous conversations with the captain I'd speculated that I'd probably be out through the playoffs (should we get in) and would just start fresh with the next season. So he in turn told the sub that he'd be playing all of the rest of the games. I didn't know that. All I knew was that I was told I could come back as soon as I was ready. So this all came as a bit of a shock yesterday.
It's not an easy situation, from any side. Like I said, I can kind of see their point. They didn't have to scramble every week looking for a goalie. This guy came in and played games at 11pm when he'd had a game earlier that night and never complained. So they want to "thank" him by throwing him a few more games. And to them, it's no big deal, two games, who cares. But to me, who has been working so hard for the last two and a half months to be back in that net, with that team, it is a big deal. I'm assured that when the new season starts I'll be in net, no question at all. I'm assured that this is nothing more than the team showing their appreciation to this guy, that it is not a reflection at all on any kind of "choice" between us or preference. As long as that is truly the case I will just suck it up and deal with it. It sucks, I'm pissed off and disappointed, but I grudgingly kind of understand. Sunday night is going to be really, really hard though.
Evidently, it had been decided by the team after Wednesday's game that even though I was ready to come back, the sub would still play the one or two playoff games remaining. It was decided that it wouldn't be "fair" to him when he came in, played two-thirds of the season's games, some with obnoxiously late times, without complaint and with a good attitude, to say 'hey thanks but our goalie is back, see ya'. While I can kind of see that side of it, I feel like I've been kicked in the teeth. It makes me wonder what about what's "fair" to the goalie you've had for four years? Also complicating matters is the fact that I'm ready sooner than I thought I would be. In previous conversations with the captain I'd speculated that I'd probably be out through the playoffs (should we get in) and would just start fresh with the next season. So he in turn told the sub that he'd be playing all of the rest of the games. I didn't know that. All I knew was that I was told I could come back as soon as I was ready. So this all came as a bit of a shock yesterday.
It's not an easy situation, from any side. Like I said, I can kind of see their point. They didn't have to scramble every week looking for a goalie. This guy came in and played games at 11pm when he'd had a game earlier that night and never complained. So they want to "thank" him by throwing him a few more games. And to them, it's no big deal, two games, who cares. But to me, who has been working so hard for the last two and a half months to be back in that net, with that team, it is a big deal. I'm assured that when the new season starts I'll be in net, no question at all. I'm assured that this is nothing more than the team showing their appreciation to this guy, that it is not a reflection at all on any kind of "choice" between us or preference. As long as that is truly the case I will just suck it up and deal with it. It sucks, I'm pissed off and disappointed, but I grudgingly kind of understand. Sunday night is going to be really, really hard though.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
This Is How Much My Teammates Rule
The combined practice/scrimmage on Saturday night went very well. We had a mixture of people from different groups there but everyone seemed to mesh pretty well and have a good time. It was a success and sounds like it might be a monthly event. We'll see- people tend to say that and then when it's time to schedule another one, no one's interested. But... I played for a solid hour and a half and was only a little bit sore by the end. I'm at the point where I'm just a fraction of a second too slow sometimes. I did have a few really good saves that made me feel like my old self again though. All I need to do now is just keep playing, and it'll come back . Tomorrow morning I'll be heading to open hockey, which will really give me a workout. Tournament in 11 days. I'm going to be ready, no problem.
All of that was great. But two of my Hawks teammates really made the night memorable. I was finishing up getting changed when there was a knock on our locker room door, and someone calling me to come outside. I went out to see #28 and "Shanny" standing there with a large tube. They said they had something for me, and it was a little while in the making, but they hoped I liked it. I was totally surprised and had no idea what to expect. I opened the tube and pulled out a poster, which when I unrolled it, revealed Jim Craig standing on the ice, wrapped in the flag, looking up. On the left hand side was scrawled in black marker "To Maalivahti- Stop Pucks!!!" and then his signature and "1980".
I was floored. I was so surprised and, yes, touched, that my brain completely stopped working. I was a little confused about where/how they'd gotten it, so I asked if they'd gone up to.... and completely forgot "Lake Placid". As in, it was totally erased from my mind. Couldn't come up with it to save my life. I felt pretty stupid and they rescued me from my stammering by explaining. (I actually had to ask them again later, because I was so stunned I didn't really remember everything they said).
Evidently, last year a relative of #28 purchased the house Jim Craig used to live in, and found a box of these posters in the basement. Enter Shanny, who has a friend who knows the guy who manages Jim's speaking engagements (he's a motivational speaker now). Shanny mentioned #28's relative's discovery, and the manager said if Shanny sent him some posters, he would have Jim sign them. Shanny mentioned that I was a goalie, hence the ultra-personalized note/signature.
How. Awesome. Is that.
I took it right to a local shop and left it to be matted and framed (red and blue mats of course). It's going to hang right over my desk at work. There's a perfect empty wall for it and everything.
I'm really lucky. I'm on two teams that are both really close and have great camraderie. I think The Mayor summed it up best. In a recent game, when coming off a bungled shift she took a lot of good natured ribbing for, she took it in stride, laughing, then paused and said "I love us!" I do love us. "We" are awesome. Both teams of us. I'm the luckiest goalie in all of beer league-dom.
All of that was great. But two of my Hawks teammates really made the night memorable. I was finishing up getting changed when there was a knock on our locker room door, and someone calling me to come outside. I went out to see #28 and "Shanny" standing there with a large tube. They said they had something for me, and it was a little while in the making, but they hoped I liked it. I was totally surprised and had no idea what to expect. I opened the tube and pulled out a poster, which when I unrolled it, revealed Jim Craig standing on the ice, wrapped in the flag, looking up. On the left hand side was scrawled in black marker "To Maalivahti- Stop Pucks!!!" and then his signature and "1980".
I was floored. I was so surprised and, yes, touched, that my brain completely stopped working. I was a little confused about where/how they'd gotten it, so I asked if they'd gone up to.... and completely forgot "Lake Placid". As in, it was totally erased from my mind. Couldn't come up with it to save my life. I felt pretty stupid and they rescued me from my stammering by explaining. (I actually had to ask them again later, because I was so stunned I didn't really remember everything they said).
Evidently, last year a relative of #28 purchased the house Jim Craig used to live in, and found a box of these posters in the basement. Enter Shanny, who has a friend who knows the guy who manages Jim's speaking engagements (he's a motivational speaker now). Shanny mentioned #28's relative's discovery, and the manager said if Shanny sent him some posters, he would have Jim sign them. Shanny mentioned that I was a goalie, hence the ultra-personalized note/signature.
How. Awesome. Is that.
I took it right to a local shop and left it to be matted and framed (red and blue mats of course). It's going to hang right over my desk at work. There's a perfect empty wall for it and everything.
I'm really lucky. I'm on two teams that are both really close and have great camraderie. I think The Mayor summed it up best. In a recent game, when coming off a bungled shift she took a lot of good natured ribbing for, she took it in stride, laughing, then paused and said "I love us!" I do love us. "We" are awesome. Both teams of us. I'm the luckiest goalie in all of beer league-dom.
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Never Satisfied
"I can't wait get this brace off my leg!"
"I'll be so much happier when I can do simple things like walk up the stairs!"
"Man, when I can just start working out again..."
"I just want to GET BACK ON THE ICE!"
Yeah, well now I'm on the ice, and I'm doing really well when I'm out there. And I'm still not happy. I want to play real games and I want to play them with my teams, dammit. The QCats season is over and I missed the last practice last night because of some seriously Biblical weather. The Hawks are finally, at long long painful last, clicking as a team and winning games. And if you've read this blog for any amount of time you know that it's been a real struggle at times and we weren't sure we'd be staying in the league just a few months ago.
(What my paranoid brain is telling me is that the reason they're winning is because I'm not there... goals against have gone down exponentially.... I'm told the defense is a lot better than it was, and we're putting up good numbers on the other end of the ice. Still, how's that for a nice goalie mind fuck? But there's no room in GoalieBrain for thoughts like that. Only in parentheses in a blog.)
So once again I'm back in the position of feeling like I'm literally straining at a leash. I want to be back in that net so bad I can feel it in the back of my throat. But the next game for the Hawks is do-or-die in terms of getting into the playoffs, and while I feel I would be strong enough to play, I'm not going to put that kind of mental pressure on myself, or open my team up to that kind of doubt. I'm going to hit at least one open hockey session and see how it goes playing at that speed. And if it goes well, I want that net back.
But for now... it's clinic. Clinic tonight, rented ice on Saturday night, and maybe I'll hit open hockey some weekday other than Friday, which is when the McKaye guys are there. Playing at that speed will be the real test. Still one day at a time over here. Going to stone some forwards tonight, bitches.
/GoalieAngst
"I'll be so much happier when I can do simple things like walk up the stairs!"
"Man, when I can just start working out again..."
"I just want to GET BACK ON THE ICE!"
Yeah, well now I'm on the ice, and I'm doing really well when I'm out there. And I'm still not happy. I want to play real games and I want to play them with my teams, dammit. The QCats season is over and I missed the last practice last night because of some seriously Biblical weather. The Hawks are finally, at long long painful last, clicking as a team and winning games. And if you've read this blog for any amount of time you know that it's been a real struggle at times and we weren't sure we'd be staying in the league just a few months ago.
(What my paranoid brain is telling me is that the reason they're winning is because I'm not there... goals against have gone down exponentially.... I'm told the defense is a lot better than it was, and we're putting up good numbers on the other end of the ice. Still, how's that for a nice goalie mind fuck? But there's no room in GoalieBrain for thoughts like that. Only in parentheses in a blog.)
So once again I'm back in the position of feeling like I'm literally straining at a leash. I want to be back in that net so bad I can feel it in the back of my throat. But the next game for the Hawks is do-or-die in terms of getting into the playoffs, and while I feel I would be strong enough to play, I'm not going to put that kind of mental pressure on myself, or open my team up to that kind of doubt. I'm going to hit at least one open hockey session and see how it goes playing at that speed. And if it goes well, I want that net back.
But for now... it's clinic. Clinic tonight, rented ice on Saturday night, and maybe I'll hit open hockey some weekday other than Friday, which is when the McKaye guys are there. Playing at that speed will be the real test. Still one day at a time over here. Going to stone some forwards tonight, bitches.
/GoalieAngst
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Welcome Home
Given that I hit the ice two nights ago for the first time in nearly two months, you'd think I would have been in here bubbling over with excitement before now. It has taken me forever to write this post though, because of two reasons. First, after my jubilant return my thoughts were so scrambled I couldn't corral them much beyond FUCK YEAH, BITCHES!, which I think is what I tweeted from the car. Second, with my boss out all week with pneumonia (!), work has been absolutely insane and by the time I get home at night my brain has hung out the "gone for the night, come back tomorrow" sign.
But now, on a gorgeous Friday that makes for a very empty office, I have some time to get my thoughts down. All day on Wednesday I was bouncing off the wall, relishing the thought that I'd be packing up my hockey bag and throwing it in the back of the truck with GoalieHusband's and making our way to the rink. (The Hawks had a rare "early" game and were on the other ice surface at the same time the QCats were practicing... more on that later). I was giddy in the locker room, and was actually met with squeals of glee as teammates came in and saw me sitting there with my giant bag, putting my gear on. The Mayor even told me that it was a sight more beautiful than her wedding day. We're serious about our hockey eh.
I was actually quite nervous though, not knowing what to expect. My plan was to spend some time off on my own, working on skating and movement etc. If my knee felt ok, I figured I'd go in the net for some shots, but I wasn't counting on it. Fortunately, it went much better than I expected! After about 10 minutes of t-pushes and pivoting and pushing, and yes, even butterflying, I thought I was in good enough shape to face some rubber. Yes, my knee hurt, but my physical therapist said the kind of pain I was experiencing was to be expected and would go away gradually with time. That's all I needed to hear- as long as I'm not damaging anything, I can work through it.
I skated over to the coach, told him I was ready, and he stopped the drill and I got into the net. And GoalieBrain instantly took over. Without even realizing it, I went through the quick get-pumped, get-focused, bang the crossbar, hit the left post, hit the ice routine that has become second nature upon getting into the net. A huge cheer went up from the girls gathered at the red line. I am having a hard time finding a way to express what I felt. It felt like something fell neatly into place and clicked. Earlier, when we'd pulled into the parking lot, GoalieHusband leaned over and kissed me and said "welcome home"... but it wasn't really until that moment that I felt it. I truly felt like I was exactly where I belonged. And it was exhilarating.
I took shots for about ten minutes and found myself completely winded. I knew I'd lose endurance but wow... I have a lot of work to do. For the most part everything felt fine. There's just one movement that gives me a bit more pain than the rest, and I'll keep my eye on it (so to speak) and make sure it doesn't seem to be getting worse the more I practice. At one point, the puck was at my knees and the forward who'd skated in and shot jumped to cover it at the same time I did (I got it... haha), and jokingly shoved me around a little. Flipper, who was previously my partner on the IR, came over and manhandled her all the way over to the boards. All involved were laughing and cheering- it was all in good fun.
With about 15 minutes left in the practice, I decided to be smart and pack it in. My knee was getting stiffer and more painful and I didn't want to push it. So I wandered (waddled, really, since I didn't want to waste time taking my gear off) over to the other rink to see how the Hawks were doing. Since they were playing the "Drunk Punks", who beat us last time, I was certainly hoping to see a scoreboard in our favor. And I did. We were up by 3 goals to their 1 when I walked in, with a Hawk in the process of putting another one in the net. With only a few minutes left, I stayed to watch, and saw the most idiotic thing I've ever seen at a rink. When they beat the goalie yet again, our guys stood dumbfounded as one of the Punks tackled another one in their defensive zone. I thought at first they were horsing around, but then I heard their voices. They were actually fighting each other. Another Punk came over and dragged the instigator off by the back of his collar, looking an awful lot like a mother cat. It was absolutely bizarre, and with only 38 seconds left, the refs just let the clock run out. Real classy bunch of guys, those Punks.
By a few teammates' accounts, it was a fantastic game on everyone's part and I'm sure it felt great to beat those guys. As anxious as I am to get back into the net "for real", with my teams, I'm playing it smart and leaving the rest of the games this season to my sub. The new season starts up again in mid-April, which is perfect timing. Just before that is the tournament with the QCats up in Massachusetts, so I'll definitely be back in top shape endurance wise. If I'm not, after 4 games in 3 days, I never will be.
But first, clinic, practice, clinic, open hockey etc etc etc to get those muscles back in motion and get my stamina back. I have a grand plan: win the tournament so I can come back and email my physical therapist a sweaty victory picture. DAMN, does it feel good to be back.
But now, on a gorgeous Friday that makes for a very empty office, I have some time to get my thoughts down. All day on Wednesday I was bouncing off the wall, relishing the thought that I'd be packing up my hockey bag and throwing it in the back of the truck with GoalieHusband's and making our way to the rink. (The Hawks had a rare "early" game and were on the other ice surface at the same time the QCats were practicing... more on that later). I was giddy in the locker room, and was actually met with squeals of glee as teammates came in and saw me sitting there with my giant bag, putting my gear on. The Mayor even told me that it was a sight more beautiful than her wedding day. We're serious about our hockey eh.
I was actually quite nervous though, not knowing what to expect. My plan was to spend some time off on my own, working on skating and movement etc. If my knee felt ok, I figured I'd go in the net for some shots, but I wasn't counting on it. Fortunately, it went much better than I expected! After about 10 minutes of t-pushes and pivoting and pushing, and yes, even butterflying, I thought I was in good enough shape to face some rubber. Yes, my knee hurt, but my physical therapist said the kind of pain I was experiencing was to be expected and would go away gradually with time. That's all I needed to hear- as long as I'm not damaging anything, I can work through it.
I skated over to the coach, told him I was ready, and he stopped the drill and I got into the net. And GoalieBrain instantly took over. Without even realizing it, I went through the quick get-pumped, get-focused, bang the crossbar, hit the left post, hit the ice routine that has become second nature upon getting into the net. A huge cheer went up from the girls gathered at the red line. I am having a hard time finding a way to express what I felt. It felt like something fell neatly into place and clicked. Earlier, when we'd pulled into the parking lot, GoalieHusband leaned over and kissed me and said "welcome home"... but it wasn't really until that moment that I felt it. I truly felt like I was exactly where I belonged. And it was exhilarating.
I took shots for about ten minutes and found myself completely winded. I knew I'd lose endurance but wow... I have a lot of work to do. For the most part everything felt fine. There's just one movement that gives me a bit more pain than the rest, and I'll keep my eye on it (so to speak) and make sure it doesn't seem to be getting worse the more I practice. At one point, the puck was at my knees and the forward who'd skated in and shot jumped to cover it at the same time I did (I got it... haha), and jokingly shoved me around a little. Flipper, who was previously my partner on the IR, came over and manhandled her all the way over to the boards. All involved were laughing and cheering- it was all in good fun.
With about 15 minutes left in the practice, I decided to be smart and pack it in. My knee was getting stiffer and more painful and I didn't want to push it. So I wandered (waddled, really, since I didn't want to waste time taking my gear off) over to the other rink to see how the Hawks were doing. Since they were playing the "Drunk Punks", who beat us last time, I was certainly hoping to see a scoreboard in our favor. And I did. We were up by 3 goals to their 1 when I walked in, with a Hawk in the process of putting another one in the net. With only a few minutes left, I stayed to watch, and saw the most idiotic thing I've ever seen at a rink. When they beat the goalie yet again, our guys stood dumbfounded as one of the Punks tackled another one in their defensive zone. I thought at first they were horsing around, but then I heard their voices. They were actually fighting each other. Another Punk came over and dragged the instigator off by the back of his collar, looking an awful lot like a mother cat. It was absolutely bizarre, and with only 38 seconds left, the refs just let the clock run out. Real classy bunch of guys, those Punks.
By a few teammates' accounts, it was a fantastic game on everyone's part and I'm sure it felt great to beat those guys. As anxious as I am to get back into the net "for real", with my teams, I'm playing it smart and leaving the rest of the games this season to my sub. The new season starts up again in mid-April, which is perfect timing. Just before that is the tournament with the QCats up in Massachusetts, so I'll definitely be back in top shape endurance wise. If I'm not, after 4 games in 3 days, I never will be.
But first, clinic, practice, clinic, open hockey etc etc etc to get those muscles back in motion and get my stamina back. I have a grand plan: win the tournament so I can come back and email my physical therapist a sweaty victory picture. DAMN, does it feel good to be back.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Goat Rodeo
Every year around this time, for the last 3 years, many of the "original" Hawks have taken part in what we lovingly refer to as the "Goat Rodeo on Ice". It is an event comprised of beer, a bunch of people who play hockey, some more beer, and a bunch of people who have either never played or haven't played in decades. And also some beer. It got its name from Senator, who during the first one, shook his head and observed "this is a complete goat rodeo".
Just as I can't stay away from my teams' games, there was no way I was going to miss this event. You might think I would want nothing to do with being at a rink right now, and in fact that was exactly how GoalieHusband was when he was injured. I have the complete opposite reaction: the need to hang out with and be with my teams is as strong as the need to play in the first place. Maybe it's a male/female thing. Besides, this was more of a social event than really a game- though it actually usually turns out to be quite a good game. So it was that GoalieHusband and I met up with the gang at the bar near the rink for some socializing before the main event. I wore my enormous goalie-cut Hawks jersey, even though it looked like a dress. This was the first time I'd seen the guys since I fell, and it felt good to just hang with them for a while. I got to catch up with one former team-mate who I haven't seen in a while and have been missing, and that was great too. But what really surprised me was actually being drafted for a team.
Inspired by the All Star festivities (and some beer), it was decided that the teams for the night would be chosen via draft. And of course, the two guys chosen as captains were two of the non-hockey playing guys, who didn't know a lot of us hockey-playing types. One captain, who I'll call Stretch, 'cause he's tall (so creative), has been at the previous events and so knows GoalieHusband and I from those occasions. I wasn't even really aware there was a draft going on, until I sat down to rest my leg and Stretch said "You're on my team". I told him he was in pretty bad shape then, since I wasn't playing. "I know," he said. "I drafted you anyway. You're our spiritual leader, I want you on our team".
This is a guy who I've met twice before. I was pretty stunned. He's a friend of one of the Hawks, a guy who along with Senator would be considered co-captain, if we had such designations. I looked at him, and he shrugged and said "I told him you weren't playing. He said he wanted you anyway, as cheerleader." "No, spiritual leader," Stretch interrupted. And with that, co-captain refilled my glass, as it was time for us all to drink up and get over to the rink.
I watched the whole game from the benches. Aside from Stretch's insistence that I be on his team, I did spend some time going back and forth. It's so strange. As a goalie, you see the whole game right there in front of you. You see plays develop, you see who's open, who's got a guy on him. But for some reason, from the bench, it looks different. The game is laid bare even more. I was fully involved the whole time, yelling out "man on", or encouragement, as if I was out there with them. For the most part, it wasn't too awful, in a mental sense. At one point I left to go to the bathroom, and stood behind one of the goalies for a bit. That was hard. That was really hard. But overall, it was an absolutely awesome evening, and I love that its become an annual tradition.
As it turns out, one of the goalies there that night will be my sub for the Hawks; he's going to play all of the games I'll miss. He's a good goalie, exciting to watch (has a bit more of an unorthodox style). We have a long layover between games for some reason and the next Hawks game isn't until February 13th. By then I'll be ONE WEEK away from my x-ray to see if the brace can come off. That's really not so horrible I guess. Maybe GoalieHusband is right and it will go a lot faster than I think it will.
Just as I can't stay away from my teams' games, there was no way I was going to miss this event. You might think I would want nothing to do with being at a rink right now, and in fact that was exactly how GoalieHusband was when he was injured. I have the complete opposite reaction: the need to hang out with and be with my teams is as strong as the need to play in the first place. Maybe it's a male/female thing. Besides, this was more of a social event than really a game- though it actually usually turns out to be quite a good game. So it was that GoalieHusband and I met up with the gang at the bar near the rink for some socializing before the main event. I wore my enormous goalie-cut Hawks jersey, even though it looked like a dress. This was the first time I'd seen the guys since I fell, and it felt good to just hang with them for a while. I got to catch up with one former team-mate who I haven't seen in a while and have been missing, and that was great too. But what really surprised me was actually being drafted for a team.
Inspired by the All Star festivities (and some beer), it was decided that the teams for the night would be chosen via draft. And of course, the two guys chosen as captains were two of the non-hockey playing guys, who didn't know a lot of us hockey-playing types. One captain, who I'll call Stretch, 'cause he's tall (so creative), has been at the previous events and so knows GoalieHusband and I from those occasions. I wasn't even really aware there was a draft going on, until I sat down to rest my leg and Stretch said "You're on my team". I told him he was in pretty bad shape then, since I wasn't playing. "I know," he said. "I drafted you anyway. You're our spiritual leader, I want you on our team".
This is a guy who I've met twice before. I was pretty stunned. He's a friend of one of the Hawks, a guy who along with Senator would be considered co-captain, if we had such designations. I looked at him, and he shrugged and said "I told him you weren't playing. He said he wanted you anyway, as cheerleader." "No, spiritual leader," Stretch interrupted. And with that, co-captain refilled my glass, as it was time for us all to drink up and get over to the rink.
I watched the whole game from the benches. Aside from Stretch's insistence that I be on his team, I did spend some time going back and forth. It's so strange. As a goalie, you see the whole game right there in front of you. You see plays develop, you see who's open, who's got a guy on him. But for some reason, from the bench, it looks different. The game is laid bare even more. I was fully involved the whole time, yelling out "man on", or encouragement, as if I was out there with them. For the most part, it wasn't too awful, in a mental sense. At one point I left to go to the bathroom, and stood behind one of the goalies for a bit. That was hard. That was really hard. But overall, it was an absolutely awesome evening, and I love that its become an annual tradition.
As it turns out, one of the goalies there that night will be my sub for the Hawks; he's going to play all of the games I'll miss. He's a good goalie, exciting to watch (has a bit more of an unorthodox style). We have a long layover between games for some reason and the next Hawks game isn't until February 13th. By then I'll be ONE WEEK away from my x-ray to see if the brace can come off. That's really not so horrible I guess. Maybe GoalieHusband is right and it will go a lot faster than I think it will.
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